Role
“To be yourself”—this words, as all moral maxims, is easier said than done. I even do not know whether I have become myself or not and it is difficult for us to tell where the role ends and when our true selves begin. Some roles are just costumes, while some, have been growing with our body, and the result of gradually shaking off roles are not much better than that of peeling onion.
Actors could remove makeup sometimes, while we can not leave the society for a moment, and according to others, we still play roles in seclusion and suicide.
Maybe, it is only when we failed to cover up the roles we try to play, can we see our true face. Every man can not avoid playing various roles in social life. However, a strong sense of role will lead to some problems and a man will expose his inner emptiness when he holds role more much important than his true color. I don't like to get involved with the people who possess a strong role of consciousness, such as the celebrities with strong celebrity sense, academics with strong authoritative sense, and bosses with strong sense of supervisors and so on, for they will make me feel tied. I am sure those people are also tired too, because they could not shake off other role: They are fathers in front of children and meek subordinates before their superiors. To some extent, they just like the never-removing-makeup-actors. Maybe some people are forced to play certain roles, but according to me, we should remove make-up if possible as well as enjoy a natural life.
Although a voice inside me, is so tenacious and never buried in any power, it will be gradually ignored, forgotten and finally become dies away in daily busyness and noise.
Every one is busy with playing its own role in the stage of life .It seems that they are much busier than actors and have no free time. For example, on one hand, I sit all day long to write for publications as well as for editors and readers’ wishes and needs. On the other hand, I heartily want to write something—the voice in my heart one day, but I am really tired up every day, while spare time coming, I really do not know what to write, because the voice inside me has been silence and gone at that time.
Do not always think that you can write it one day, because selfhood does not always listen to you and much more even, it will be impatient as well as disappears when you put it back.
It is not easy for people to escape from roles. Sometimes, one always plays another role unconsciously when he tries to shake off the traditional one, because anti-role is a role, too.
One kind of person turns out to be sincere unconsciously to move others as well as him, and he is really moved by himself at last.
Another kind of people appears cunning deliberately to delude others as well as him and lastly makes it.
Handsomeness should be natural, relaxed, and not artificial. However, affectation is viewed as handsome when it naturally appears without making any restrained cuing.
Handsomeness nowadays has been a fashion, and “enjoying a handsome life” has been a slogan. As a result, people race to make natural postures, by which it reveals an unnatural time.
What is falsity? Falsity is unreal, or tends to be real purposely. “I should be true!”—actually you are factitious.
What’s affectation? Affectation is insincere or appears faithful deliberately. “I should be faithful!” ——but you have been pretentious. For some people, sincerity is always nothing but a role he likes to play. While getting inside sincerely and then mixing feely with the character, he finally believes that the character is he himself, involuntarily moved by his own sincere performance as well.
If sincerity is a person’s inherent nature and the behavioral ways out of his nature, he will not be moved by his own sincerity easily. For example, one knows little about his own blood type and breathing, even though, who will care about that? (Write here, I sense that this parable is improper, because with the popularity booklets, like blood type and personality 、blood and love, there is some one care about his blood type. Above is just my metaphor.)
From what I have mentioned above, I gain a reliable standard for sincerity identification, that is, whether a man is moved by his own sincerity or not. If not, there must be playacting and affectation.
The person, who is occasionally sincere and gets inside the faithful character, will be easily moved by its sincerity.
Maybe one could admit his various weak points, but he will never admit his inveracity, his insincerity as well, for it needs a great deal of good faith to do that. Sometimes, it seems that a man have the courage to admit his insincerity, from which he can gain satisfactions as well. Meanwhile, he thinks that he is more sincere than others: All of you dare not admit that, and I admit it! And then he denies his insincerity by doing so. Thus, he actually does not admit it in the final analysis. The admission of affectation itself is a kind of affectation, too.
The affected man does not lose his nature totally and he just imitates how to affect at the very beginning. However, he will become an affected person in nature when he is not aware of he being pretentious and really moved, then we could say, he is the master of affectation.
There is always a judge and a criminal in the soul of a sincere man. Only both of them reach a settlement can the soul be saved.
For the soul of a pretentious man, there is always a player and a audience in it and it can get salvation when both sides are weary of each other.
A girl read the biography of Vincent van Gogh，with tears full of her eyes. She thought：“If I had been born at that time, I would marry him.” I think, there must be some girls at the Vincent’s time imagining marrying the genius in earlier era, but meanwhile, Vincent van Gogh still could not find a girl who was willing to marry him.