One
A white rabbit scampered about to the bakery, asked the shopkeeper:" Do you have one hundred of small bread?"
Shopkeeper:" Ah, I'm so sorry that I haven't so much small bread."
"Oh, in this way……" the white rabbit went away down in the mouth.
The second day, the white rabbit scampered about to the bakery, "Shopkeeper, do you have one hundred of small bread?"
Shopkeeper:” Sorry, still haven’t.”
"Oh, in this way……" the white rabbit went away down in the mouth.
The second day, the white rabbit scampered about to the bakery,
"Shopkeeper, do you have one hundred of small bread?"
Shopkeeper said happily: Yes, yes, today we have one hundred of small bread!”
The white rabbit fished out money:” That’s great, I will buy two.”
Two
There was a white rabbit running in the forest happily,
On the way, she met a giraffe rolling hemp,
The white rabbit said to the giraffe:” Giraffe, giraffe, why do you do things which are harmful yourself?
Look how nice this forest is; let’s run together in the Nature!”
The giraffe looked around the hemp, and looked around the white rabbit, then threw the hemp away backwards, and ran about the forest following with the white rabbit.
Subsequently, they met an elephant intending to inhale cocaine,
The white rabbit said to the elephant:” Elephant, elephant, why do you do things which are harmful yourself?”
Look how nice this forest is; let’s run together in the Nature!”
The elephant looked around the cocaine, and looked around the white rabbit, then threw the cocaine away backwards, and ran about the forest following with the small white rabbit and the giraffe.
Subsequently, they met a lion intending to inject the heroin,
The white rabbit said to the lion:” Lion, lion, why do you do things which are harmful yourself?”
Look how nice the forest is; let’s run together in the Nature!”
The lion looked around the syringe, and looked around the white rabbit, then threw the syringe away backwards, and rushed to the white rabbit, beating her heavily.
The elephant and the giraffe trembled with fear:” why do you beat the white rabbit? She is so kind to care our healthy and let us be close with the Nature.”
The lion said angrily:” This bastard rabbit, once she ate the dancing outreach, she would drag me run about the forest like a fool.”
Three
The first day, the white rabbit went to river to fish, fishing nothing, then went back home.
The second day, the white rabbit went to river to fish again, still fishing nothing, then went back home.
The third day, when the white rabbit just arrived the river, a big fish dapped from the river, shouting at the white rabbit:” Fuck, if you dare use the carrot as the bait, I will beat you to death!”
Four
In order to test the strength of police in America, Hong Kong and China, the U.N. put three rabbits in three forests, wanting to see who will find rabbit the fastest.
In front of the first forest were American police, at first they spent half a day holding a meeting to set down the plan, dividing the work strictly, then sent the Green Berets enter into the forest fast to carpet search, but because of the meeting delayed the time, the rabbit ran away, task failed!
Then it is turn of Hong Kong police, they sent more than one hundred police and tens of police wagons, arraying outside the forest, shouted by a leader:” Rabbit, rabbit, you have been surrounded, come out to surrender……” Half a day passed, there was no movement. Then Fly Tiger Team entered into the forest, searching all over, having no results, task failed!
Finally it is turn of Chinese police, only four, at first they played mahjong for a whole day, at dusk, they entered into the forest each with a baton, less than five minutes, hearing that a heartrending cry from the forest, Chinese police smiled to come out, each taking out a cigarette, dragging a black and blue bear backwards, the bare said at the last gasp:” Don’t beat me again, I am the rabbit……”
Five
The white rabbit took a walk in the forest, facing with a timber wolf, which came up to give the white rabbit two slaps, and said:” Make you not wear cap.” The white rabbit removed with grievance.
The second day, she wore a cap scampering about went out home, meeting the timber wolf again, he came up to give her two slaps again, and said:” Make you wear cap.”
The rabbit was depressed, considering for a long time, finally she decided to complain to the king of the forest—tiger.
After explaining the circs, the tiger said:” OK, I see, I will handle this ting, you should believe the organization.” At the same day, the tiger found his nabs—the timber wolf. “It’s not proper that you did like this, and difficult to handle to me.” After saying these, he mopped up the cigarette ash flew on the desk:” Do you think it’s viable like this? You can say, come on, rabbit, and go to find a piece of meat for me! When she finds fat, you can say you like thin; when she finds a thin, you can say you like fat. Then you can beat her. Of cause, you can also say like this. Come on, rabbit, and find a female for me. When she finds plump, you can say you like slender; when she finds slender, you can say you like plump. You can beat him reasonably.” The timber wolf nodded frequent, and clapped gladly, the respect to the tiger rushed to the tip again. Unexpectedly, the guidance above was heard by the white rabbit outside the window, who was removing weeds in the tiger’s home. How hate she was in the heart!
The next day, the white rabbit left home again, by chance, facing with her was still the timber wolf. The timber wolf said:” Come on, rabbit, find a piece of meat for me.” The rabbit said:” Ur, which do you like, fat or thin?” After listening this, the timber wolf was deep in the heart, and then was happy again, said in the heart, fortunately I have scheme B. He said again:” Rabbit, find a female for me quickly.” The rabbit asked:” Ur, which do you like, plump or slender?” The timber wolf silenced for 2 seconds, raising his hands and gave the rabbit two slaps. “Kao, make you not wear cap.”
Six
The bear and the rabbit shitted in the forest, then the bear asked the rabbit:” Do you lose hair?” Rabbit said:” Don’t~” So the bear took the rabbit to wipe the ass.
Seven
A rabbit indecent assaulted a wolf (This rabbit is merciless),
Then she ran away, the wolf pursued it with anger,
The rabbit saw the wolf was about to pursue her,
Then sat down under a tree,
Wearing a sunglasses, watching a newspaper,
Pretended nothing happened,
At the moment, wolf ran here; saw the rabbit sat down under the tree,
Asked:” Do you see a rabbit running away?”
The rabbit answered:” Is it the rabbit indecent assaulted a wolf?”
The wolf shouted:” How can I do! It’s on the newspaper so quickly!!!”
Eight
One day, a white rabbit came to a shop, asking the shopkeeper:” Do you have carrot?”
The shopkeeper shook his head:” No.”
Listening this, the white rabbit ran away with “whoosh”
The second day, the white rabbit came to the shop again, asking the shopkeeper:” Do you have carrot?”
The shopkeeper shook his head angrily:” No.”
Listening this, the white rabbit ran away with “whoosh”
The third day, the white rabbit came to the shop again, asking the shopkeeper:” Do you have carrot?”
The shopkeeper shouted angrily:” No, no! If you ask me again, I will pull out your teeth with pliers!”
Listening this, the white rabbit ran away with “whoosh”
The fourth day, the white rabbit came to the shop again, asking the shopkeeper cowardly:” Do you have pliers?”
The shopkeeper said:” No.”
So the white rabbit asked:” Do you have carrot?”
Don’t know how many days passed, one black rabbit came to the shop, asking the shopkeeper:” Do you have carrot?”
The shopkeeper shook his head angrily:” No.”
Listening this, the black rabbit ran away with “whoosh”
The second day, the black rabbit came to the shop again, asking the shopkeeper:” Do you have carrot?”
The shopkeeper was very angry:” No, no! If you ask me again, I will pull out your teeth with pliers!”
Listening this, the black rabbit ran away with “whoosh”
The third day, the black rabbit came to the shop again, asking the shopkeeper cowardly:” Do you have pliers?”
The shopkeeper said angrily:” No.”
So the black rabbit asked:” Do you have carrot?”
The shopkeeper was so angry that he caught the black rabbit, taking out a small hammer, and knocked off the teeth of the black rabbit.
The fourth day, the black rabbit came to the shop again, asking the shopkeeper ambiguously:” Do you have carrot juice?”
Nine
The giraffe said:” rabbit, I hope you can know how nice to have a long neck
No matter how delicious things, when I eat it, it is will throughout my long neck slowly; the relish will be enjoyed for a long time.”
The rabbit looked at him expressionlessly.
“Also, in the summer, rabbit, the cool water is so delicious when flows my long neck. Having a long neck is so great! Rabbit, can you imagine?”
The rabbit said slowly:” Did you vomit?”
Ten
One day, a kangaroo drove a car sauntered around in the village alley, suddenly, he saw a white rabbit stayed in the middle of the alley, and her ears and body nearly bent over the ground, as if she heard something……
So, the kangaroo got off, asked curiously:” Rabbit, what you are hearing?”
“Half an hour before, there was a van passed here……”
“Wow, so magical!.. But how did you know?”
“Damn it! My neck and legs is broke off like this……”
Eleven
An ant walked in the forest, suddenly he met an elephant, the ant chiseled in the earth quickly, holding out a leg.
After seeing this, the white rabbit was very curious, asking:” what are you up for?”
The ant said to her stealthily: Sh…… Don’t make noise, look at me stumble him……”
Twelve
One day, a rabbit was writing something in front of a cave, a wolf came on and asked:” Rabbit, what are you writing?”
The rabbit answered:” I am writing a thesis.”
The wolf asked again:” What’s the title?”
The rabbit answered:” I am writing how a rabbit eat a wolf.”
After listening this, the wolf laughed, showing he didn’t believe it.
The rabbit said:” Follow me.” After leading him to enter a cave, the rabbit continued to write in front of the cave. At this moment a fox came on, and asked:” Rabbit, what are you writing?”
The rabbit answered:” I’m writing a thesis.”
The fox asked:” What is the title?”
The rabbit answered:” How a rabbit eat a fox?”
After listening this, the fox laughed, showing he didn’t believe it.
The rabbit said:” Follow me.” After leading him to enter the cave, a moment later, the rabbit went out the cave alone, and continued to write her thesis.
At this moment, a lion in the cave was sitting on a heap of skeletons, getting rid of teeth and looking at the thesis of rabbit: The capacity of an animal is not due to his strength, but who his boss behind the curtain is!
Thirteen
In a madhouse, one day, the director wanted to see the resumed circs of three psychopaths, so he set one white rabbit in front of each of them, the first psychopath sat on the white rabbit, seizing the rabbit’s two ears, shouting:” Go”, The director shook his head; the second psychopath backed to the white rabbit, patting her ass, and said:” Pursue”, the director signed; the third squatted and persistently touched the white rabbit, after seeing this, the director nodded his head satisfactorily, only listened he said:” Give your 300 meters, after wiping car, I will pursue you!” The director fainted to ground……”
Fourteen
The white rabbit and the black bear squatted under the tree to shit.
The black bear said to the white rabbit: Although you white rabbit is good looking, just troublesome! Once stained with some dirty things, will be discovered, how sick!
The white rabbit said: Listen to your words you said! Whether it is so or not?”
The black bear said: Isn’t it? Saying with this, he took the white rabbit to wipe his ass, then speeding off.
Fifteen
A white rabbit and a black bear walked in the forest, kicking off a pot with incaution.
A fairy went out from the pot, and said she can satisfy them each three wishes.
The bear said transformed him into the strongest bear in the world. His wish came true.
The white rabbit said gave her a small headpiece. Her wish came true too.
The bear said transformed him into the most beautiful bear in the world. His wish came true again.
The white rabbit said gave her a bike. Her wish came true again.
The bear said transformed other bears in the world into female bears!
The rabbit ran the bike, saying transformed this bear into homosexuality……”
Sixteen
Three rabbits pick up a mushroom,
Two olders let the young fetch some potherb to eat,
The young said: I don’t go, if I go, you will eat my mushroom,
Two olders said: We won’t, Set Your Heart at Rest. So the young rabbit went away~~~
Half a year passed, the young rabbit was still not came back, the two olders consulted: Don’t wait, we eat it.
The other older said: wait for a moment~~
One year passed, the young rabbit was still not came back, one older said: She will not come back, we eat it.
At this moment, the young rabbit dapped out from the bush aside, and said angrily:” Look, I just knew you will eat my mushroom!”
Seventeen
White rabbit · Wolf
White rabbit: Ask me quickly, ask me quickly. “Are you rabbit?”
Timber wolf:” Are you rabbit?”
Rabbit:” Yes, yes. I’m just rabbit.”
Rabbit:” Ask me quickly, ask me quickly. “Are you giraffe?”
Timber wolf:” Are you giraffe?”
Rabbit:” You are silly, don’t I tell you that I’m rabbit?”
Timber wolf:”……”