Photo by teo
Sometimes life falls apart. Maybe a loved one dies or leaves, we lose our job, or we experience other kinds of traumatic events. At first, it might seem impossible for the broken bits of life to knit together.
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That’s what it felt like last year when an investment went horribly wrong. A new house planned for resale ended up languishing half-built and degrading steadily in the rain, whilst the builder skipped the country to live it up on a South Sea island. I ended up with a six-figure loss and suddenly faced an uncertain future. Worried, angry, and confused, I started to slide into depression.
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At that time I reminded myself of the Five Steps of Healing that I had taught others in the past:
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• Acceptance
The first response to disaster is usually denial—which is the opposite of acceptance. Acceptance is the first step of healing. It can take a long time to emerge from denial. Acceptance grows slowly over time.
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A new beginning can only happen when the old form disintegrates. Look at what happens when a caterpillar becomes a butterfly. If you compare a caterpillar to a butterfly, they seem worlds apart and yet one transforms into the other. In some sense, you could say that the caterpillar dies. From this death, a new, beautiful form arises.
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• Presence
To be present is our natural state of mind. What I mean by ‘being present’ is an awareness of the moment we are actually living right now. It’s difficult to be present during a crisis because the mind is in the grip of four mind states: distraction, obsession, intrusive images, and catastrophising. These states are fueled by emotions, especially by anger, jealousy, and fear, as well as by guilt and shame.
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To be present is to be fully alive. Caught in a fog of memories, hopes and fears, we miss the moment. The present moment is a space without past or future. On our healing journey, moments of presence are points of rest and renewal.
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• Action
To heal it is important for us to overcome apathy. Apathy, the unwillingness to engage in action comes in many guises. It can range from ‘too exhausted’ to ‘can’t be bothered’. It’s the physical expression of emotional numbness. Action is the way out of apathy because movement triggers energy.
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• Forgiveness
Forgiveness puts grievance to rest. To be able to forgive, we must first overcome hate, resentment, and bitterness, and develop loving-kindness and compassion.
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To forgive is difficult. Many people indulge in grudges for years or even decades. It seems even more difficult to forgive ourselves. Forgiveness is not an act of will. It’s not a psychological, but a spiritual process. Forgiveness means that we have to let go of resentment, righteous indignation, and anger. We can’t will ourselves to forgive. But, if we cultivate loving-kindness and compassion, forgiveness can grow.
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• Integration
Think of your life as a map. At the centre of this map are the areas that stand for people, activities or things that you hold dear. When a life crisis happens, a central piece gets erased from that map.
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Integration means redrawing our map of life and filling the empty place with new meaning. For this process you need to rebuild confidence, and develop acceptance and resilience.
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I followed these five steps and they allowed me to move forward and heal. That’s why I decided to write an Ebook in order to help others find a way through dark times.
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.As a psychotherapist and Zen master I have helped many people work through the worst times in their lives and shown them how to recover and be happy again.
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In my Ebook I’ve collected inspiring stories of people I know personally who have emerged from great suffering stronger and happier.
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From Tragedy to Triumph shows you how to reclaim your life. It will guide you to:
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Overcome fear, anger, jealousy, guilt, and stress.
Use proven feel-better strategies.
Rid yourself of obsessive thoughts.
Free yourself from hate, resentment, and bitterness.
Find forgiveness.
Return to your normal life happy and free of worry.
Discover new meaning in life.
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“Wow. While not in the midst of tragedy right now, I still found myself profoundly moved by the passages in this book. I believe this book should be required reading for anyone who is … breathing. Reading this made me feel stronger, more alive!”
Annie B.
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I have added a FREE audio version that you can listen to when you can’t sleep or are anxious and sad.
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Both Ebook and audio can be downloaded immediately and payment is by secure online server.
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From Tragedy to Triumph is fully illustrated with inspiring images by leading photographers.
Buy it now for only $12.50 (includes a 42 page Ebook and a FREE audio version).
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My heartfelt wishes for your wellbeing accompany From Tragedy to Triumph.
Click the ‘Buy Now’ button to find healing and happiness.
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If you have a blog or website and would like to offer From Tragedy to Triumph as an affiliate, please contact me for details.
