 Oh god I'm so bleedin' hot. It must be 48 degrees Celsius outside. Feck me es hot. Where the feck is the ice cream man?  Oh feck me, Oi'm bleedin' doiyin! Eghhhh es a good fing I took me clothes down. Es just mah skin feels loik es meltin' roight off. Where the feck is the ice cream man?  Oi god. What if somefin' happened to him? What if he was invulved in a 'orrible crash? You selfish tw*t, eez prolly dainglin' upsoid down in his feckin' truck, a tie-uh spinnin', ice cream slowly meltin', meltin' away in this heat, as he drowns amidst all of those deliciously cool, creamy liquid flavehs. Oi jesus kroist. Where the feck is the ice cream man?  EES PROBABLY DEEEED! EES DEAD AND OIM GONNA BE WAITIN' 'ERE THE REST OF ME LOIF! WAITIN' TO 'EAR THE TINGLIN' OF HIS JINGLY BEHWS! BUT IT AIN'T NEVER COMIN! OIM GONNA SUFFOCATE TO DEAF!!! WHERE THE FECK IS HE???  OK Winehouse. Jus relax, 'ees probably fine. Let me just toss this unidentifiable object right out the window so as to take my moind off of fings. (1 minute) Seriously, where the feck is he?  (Soft humming for 2 hours.)  You know what? Feck this. I'm gonna go shoot me arms up with some 'eroine. THE END.
From The Blogs
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04-19
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Supermarket staff were mystified when a cream for babys bottom began selling like hot cakes. Then they discovered the reason - mums were putting it on their own faces. At £2.49 a pot, Waitroses ow...
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03-07
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For hundreds of years, ice cream and overhead lighting have been virtually synonymous. Think about it: incandescent light bulbs look exactly like scoops of ice cream, and what other possible explanati...
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03-24
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Protect the Future of Ice Cream... by Eating Ice CreamHäagen-Dazs pitches in to protect the honeybee. If honeybees die off, it will endanger ice cream, warns Häagen-Dazs: The cows whose milk makes ic...
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07-22
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Beer and hot summer days go hand in hand, just as beer does with ice cream. Say WHAT you ask? Yes, so you may just want to grab one the latest crazes to hit Virginia streets for frozen beer on a stick...
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04-10
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As I mentioned in my last post, the Iowa caucuses are the first test for aspiring presidential candidates. A good showing in Iowa and then a success in the New Hampshire primary a week later gives a c...
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05-15
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[Photo Credit: Newscom]Amy Winehouse is set to be the main attraction at this year’s London Fashion Week, sources say.Welsh designer Julien Macdonald says that Amy has a great style and he’s desperate...
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05-16
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Yeah, this looks healthy. Hangin with Amy Winehouse is probably not the best place for a fresh-out-of-jail- junkie to be. But thats where Pete Doherty seems to be poppin up everyday. Actually, they do...
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04-16
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Some recipes for homemade creams and lotions are really complicated. This one below has a lot of steps, but is relatively easy in comparison to most.Any herb face and body cream: Pick a herb. You can ...
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04-07
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I love this time of year because fresh strawberries are just coming in to market here in Texas. I found a full flat of them for 14.00 and snagged them. They were red, ripe, and fragrant, and on sale....
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09-15
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Jamies suspicious about squalane: My friend swears by pure squalane oil but I find it kind of suspicious. Supposedly its derived from olive oil or shark liver. Its found in quite a few body products b...
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