There are ladies who lunch. And then there are ladies who do tea. Afternoon tea.
You can join them at the Ritz Hotel’s Palm Court, if you like. This is a marvellous, rather camp atmosphere, with Louis XIV furniture, chandeliers, bone china tea service. I can imagine Hercule Poirot or perhaps Lord Peter Wimsey taking tea here. And you’ll need to follow the rather formal dress code of the period - no trainers, no jeans, and gents, wear a jacket and tie.
A variety of sandwiches, scones, pastries, and of course your tea, will set you back £37. And you’ll need to book a month in advance for this venerable British institution.
But the hotel that won the Tea Guild’s top prize last year wasn’t the Ritz, but the Dorchester, where tea is served in The Promenade. Here too you’re in plush surroundings, but perhaps more intimate and less flashy than the Ritz. You can have a champagne afternoon tea - this seems to be a new idea, as champagne certainly wasn’t a mid afternoon drink in the great days of the English tea tradition - or a regular tea with finger sandwiches, scones, and a selection of cakes, for £31.50. The tea list is impressive, including a rare and valuable ‘white tea’ (completely unfermented, it’s even sweeter than green tea) and caffeine free teas for those who just don’t need the buzz.
You can buy gift certificates too. (I wish someone would buy me one, but my significant other obviously doesn’t read my blog, because he never gets any of my hints!)
A third very strong contender is Brown’s Hotel, where tea is served in the lounge while the piano player tinkles away. It’s the quintessential English teatime haunt, even though the hotel has been given a refurb with contemporary hints to the style - Queen Victoria is said to have taken tea here and it’s redolent with this long tradition. Tea here is served from 3-6 Monday to Friday, and 1-6 at weekends, and costs £35. You can taste Tregothnan tea, grown in a tiny microclimate in Cornwall - surely one of the greatest rarities you can find in London!
I must admit that these hotels aren’t particularly my style. They can be a bit overdone - tea at one is a wonderful treat, but certainly not for every day. So I might head out west to the Orangery at Kensington Palace.
This superb baroque building was designed by Vanbrugh, and has carvings by Grinling Gibbons carvings. It’s truly splendid architecture and unlike Hampton Court or St Paul’s Cathedral, other showpieces of the English baroque, you can admire it at your leisure while taking tea. You can sit on the terrace if the weather is fine.
This is also where I’d head if I had children in tow - the Orangery welcomes kids and even has a special version of tea for them.
The Orangery tea, including a cream cheese and cucumber sandwich, scone, and tea (or coffee) is £11.95, while a champagne tea includes Belgian chocolate cake (wickedly untraditional!) as well as champagne.
Finally, you can find a much more contemporary approach to tea at Teasmith, in Spitalfields. It’s very much a ‘new wave’ tea bar, in cool modern style, and the focus is very much on the tea. The owner is a real expert, and even offers masterclasses in tea tasting. There is a huge variety of teas.
But the real draw for me is the teacakes. Something you won’t get in most of the posh establishments - but probably my favourite tea accompaniment. Never mind scones and cream, this is the real thing!
