I work at a summer camp and I was wondering what age is a good age to enroll my daughter in a camp for the summer?


I’m guessing that you’re experiencing a lot of kids who aren’t necessarily “happy campers” who aren’t ready to be off on their own.  The basic rule to sending a kid to any camp is: “Be sure the kid is ready.”

Most experts feel that age eight is when a child is ready for a summer camp.  Most parents feel kids are ready for their first overnight by age seven. Even then, there is no magic age when your child is emotionally ready to be away from home.  Even she begs to spend a few hours or the night away, she may not be ready.

Here are a few basic questions to help gauge whether your child is ready to venture forth without you for just a sleep-over let alone a away at a camp:

• Is your child sleeping in her own bed through the night or is she climbing in with you at two o’clock in the morning?
  
• Does she have any problems separating from you when she goes to day care, the baby-sitters or school?
  
• Does your child get along with this kid (and their parents) well enough to spend a whole night together? Or what would be considered a twelve-hour play date?
  
• Has she successfully made it through the night at a close friends or relatives?
  
• Do you think your child is really ready for this experience?
  
• Is this something my child wants to do or is it what I hope she will do?

If you can say, “Yep—all a-okay” to each of those queries, then apply the “Baby Step Model.” Start by sending your kid to a half-day camp, next to a full day, then overnight, then a weekend away, until finally she’s packed off to the week (or more) long camp. Watch to see how well your child adjusts to each step along the way (as well as how the camp counselors adjust to your kid).

Even with all that advance prep, research shows that things aren’t always “total bliss.” Up to 80% of kids who go to sleep-away camp miss something about home, so don’t be surprised if you get that “Mooommmmm, come pick me up now!” call.

The good news is that the majority of those pangs do ease over the next two or three days. The best way to gauge how well your child is doing is to ask a simple question. “How homesick have you been feeling?” Most parents assume it will worsen the symptoms when, on the contrary, researchers find it actually puts you in a better position to hear where your child is coming from and check-in on his emotional state. Then you can decide if he can make it a bit longer or does need to be rescued.

Click here to read more of Michele Borba's Q&As, or leave a comment below with your own questions and it may be answered next week.

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Dr. Michele Borba is the author of Building Moral Intelligence: The Seven Essentail Virtues That Teach Kids to Do the Right Thing.