When my best friend and I first entered college, we were blubbering idiots when it came to anything having to do with sex. She would wholeheartedly agree with me. If people talked about condoms, we’d snicker like eight year-old boys. It’s no wonder neither one of us had even come remotely close to sex. Behind the scenes, though, we were preparing for that encounter. We’d secretly rent porn to actually see what sex looked like and we jointly owned a book called “How to Make Love to a Man (Safely)” by Alexandra Penney. On a road trip in our freshman year, we took turns reading it to each other. One thing Ms. Penney wrote about that always stuck with me was performing oral sex on a man using a condom. My reaction to that scenario now is the same as it was back then. I tilt my head to the side and think, “Is that even possible?” It is.
Before we explore the “how,” let’s explore the “why” first. While transmission of HIV through oral sex is lower than vaginal or anal sex, the truth of the matter is that HIV is found in pre-cum, semen and vaginal fluids. Also, if you have any type of cut or sore in your mouth, the risk of transmission is multiplied. According to studies done by the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), transmission of HIV through oral sex accounts for up to 8 percent of all cases. Another point to consider is the fact that the traces of HIV in an infected person’s fluids are quite variable. For example, pre-cum has a lower amount of the virus than semen. Also, when a woman is menstruating, there is more of the virus present in her blood than in her regular vaginal secretions. Remember that HIV is not the only STD that is capable of being transmitted during oral sex. Gonorrhea and herpes are easily passed to partners during oral sex, especially since the infected person may or may not be displaying symptoms of the virus.
Let us now press forward with the “how.” If performing oral sex on a man, all that is needed is a regular condom. Slip the condom on like you normally would. For the sake of your taste buds, you might want to invest in flavored condoms for the deed. Give the condom a little pre-lick/taste before putting it on your partner to make sure you will be able to stand the taste. Remember to discard the condom and begin with a fresh one if you move on to vaginal or anal sex. If performing oral sex on a woman, you have many options available to you. If you have not invested in a dental dam (square piece of latex used for oral sex), you can simply make your own. Check your pantry for some Saran Wrap (the non-microwavable type) and cut out a small square of this to use as a dental dam. If you have condoms, cut the tip off with scissors and then cut down one side of the condom to create a square which can also be used as a dam. Simply place the dental dam on the vulva and you and your partner are ready to go.
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