网络约会的十大要点

读者: 2042    发布时间: 2008

原文: 10 Things You Need To Know About Internet Dating

  1. Internet Dating is a form of sales.

    You are about to pitch an ideal image that will attract your future mate. As someone in the “older” age group, you've learned to live with your faults, so don't omit them from your profile. You are appealing to lots of second-hand men so gild your own negative attributes with humour - I really enjoy eating and it shows, by which you mean, I am overweight, do you like love handles?
  2. Internet Dating is a new form of introduction agency.

    At best, it's going to be therapy for your loneliness, a morale booster; at worst, you'll get emails from tadpoles, meet a few giant frogs and kiss the odd toad - men who just are not right for you. Nothing ventured, nothing gained...and a few words about money. Most dating sites charge a fee which grants members email facilities, instant messaging and other extras. Some hot males expect all for nothing; an email address is secreted somewhere in the fee-avoider's profile and he actually expects women to write to him. One cheeky chap listed his mobile number and very little else in his profile. Certainly a direct approach but not in the spirit of Internet Dating.
  3. You do not have to fill in every category of the questionnaire.

    But you should upload a recent photograph and write the About Me section. If these details are missing, possible contacts may click on by. It works the other way round too - he may sound very pleasant but why can't he upload his photo and why won't he say more about himself - something to hide, or someone?
  4. All the safeguards you read on the Internet must be followed.

     But do not be afraid of fear itself. If your fractious nerves outweigh your desire to meet a man, Internet Dating may not work for you. Although some online men are insincere in their intentions, many are keen to meet a charming and honest person like you.
  5. A man who wants to meet for less-than-honest reasons usually gives himself away.

    In the time it takes to chat online and by mobile phone. It is not always good to talk. Anyone who wants phone sex, webcam peaks and perks, or just sounds a bit odd, is not a conversationalist. You've only given him your mobile number, haven't you, so call bar his number pronto and block his profile online. He's asked for it.
  6. Learn from other Internet Daters and listen to your inner self.

     If you meet someone for coffee and he is nothing like you were expecting, not in the least your type of man, not even as a casual friend, be sociable but indicate clearly that you can see no future in ever meeting again. Even if he has travelled the length of the country, you do not have to ask him home for dinner today or any other day. If this man is not for you, let your “no” be NO.
  7. Or maybe he wants sex, do you?

    For some women, Internet Dating has brought the opportunity to arrange fun and games away from their normal home life. Internet Dating is a useful method to initiate these close encounters, more direct than dancing around your handbag at the singles club and waiting for the right guy, any guy, to pull you. If freedom of choice is your thing, let your “yes” be OK then.
  8. When you meet someone you really like, make it clear you want to talk again.

    Tell them you want  on the phone or meet again soon. Don't try to predict what the future holds...take things a day at a time. If this doesn't work out, don't immediately blame virtual dating - that was just how you met. But if you are now seeing each other, enjoy yourself, getting to know him and all your dates, because now…
  9. When you are no longer Internet Dating, you have more of a chance for success.

    You have as much chance for success as the cooing couple who met while waiting for the photocopier to produce the incredible amount of paperwork they often seem to need. Remember to give yourself time to test the image of this man that you formed while talking on the internet and telephone; you cannot possibly know him well enough until you meet regularly. Get to know each other's friends and family. In other words, proceed with real life as soon as possible.
  10. Spread the word - Internet Dating works.

    Once this new relationship becomes established, it'll be time to thank the dating site owners and say “goodbye” to all your online contacts. Congratulations - Internet Dating has brought you both together. One Friday night three years ago, I took the plunge and asked the chap who kept looking at my profile if he “would you like to chat awhile”. We've hardly stopped talking since, and now that is face to face as Mr & Mrs Secondtimearound.

译文: 网络约会的十大要点

 
网络约会等于销售。 

      你准备要好要上传一张理想的图片来吸引你的理想情人了?在社会混迹多年以后,相信你也已经学会了接受自己的缺点了吧?那么,请尽管在档案上说说你的这些缺点。毕竟很多二手男人对你还是青睐有加的。尝试一下给你的这些缺点镀镀金吧。譬如你可以说,我真的很享受各种美食,你可以看得出来的。其实你的意思是在说:我的体态有些臃肿了,你喜欢“肥腰”吗?

网络约会其实是新型的婚姻中介
      最好的情况是:网络约会成为你治疗寂寞病最好的药方,大大增强你在情场上的士气;最坏的情况是:你收到来自蝌蚪的信,和一些大青蛙约会,甚至和癞蛤蟆接吻――这些都不是你的真名天子。不入虎穴焉得虎子?… … 然后我还想顺便说说关于费用的问题。很多交友网站都会在收取一定的费用后才向需求方提供其他会员的邮箱、即时通讯方式等等附加信息。“畅销”的男士都是期待不劳而获的;还有一些是期待女士主动写信给他们的,他们可能已经用巧妙的方法把自己的邮箱地址写在档案上,从而避免产生费用(譬如用其他代码代替通用的邮箱地址写法)。一个狡猾的用户可以把他的电话号码和其他的信息隐秘地列在了档案中。这是非常直接的方法,但是有些违背网络约会的精神了。
 
你不必回答调查问卷中的所有问题。 

      但是,你必需要上传一张最近的照片,完成自我介绍的栏目。没有这些信息,机会很可能就会从你身边溜走了。当然也可能有这样的效果――别人会想:这个或许是个不错的人,但是为什么他不上传自己的照片、不谈谈自己的情况呢?是有事情要隐瞒?有不可告人的秘密?
 
必需严格执行从网络上习得的保护措施
      但是不要产生过度的恐惧感。如果你脑袋中焦虑的神经多于你与男人约会的欲望,网络约会或许不适合你。虽然说网络上还是有动机不良的男人的,但是大部分还是想找到像你这样一位迷人、诚实的对象的。

通常来说,一个男人接受不够诚实的人作为约会对象,自己也不会是什么好货色。
现在网上聊天和电话聊天也是挺流行的。但是这是耗费精力的做法,通常不会有什么好结果。那些想电话做爱,视频做爱等等的人,或者是声音有些奇怪的人,通常都不是健谈的人。你已经给他们电话了?是吧?!干净把他的电话列入黑名单吧!他是自找的!

听取其他网民的意见;听从内心。 

      如果你发现你咖啡约会的对象根本不是你想象中的那样,不可能是你的那杯咖啡,甚至连成为普通朋友都不可能的话,那么请您有礼貌地、清晰地表明你的态度吧!告诉他你觉得不会有第二次约会了。哪怕他是远道而来,你也不必邀请这样一位仁兄回家吃饭。今天不必要,以后也不必要。如果内心告知自己,他不是你要找的人,尽管听从内心就好了。
 
或者是他想要性,你呢? 

      对于一些女性来说,网络约会带来一些她们日常家庭生活外游戏人生的机会。比起在单身舞会上提着手提包跳支舞,等待属于你的那条鱼儿上钩的方式,网络约会的确更快捷地帮她们实现了鱼水之欢的欲望。如果你觉得自由性爱是你所追求的,不要在婚礼上对你的另一半说出“我愿意”。
 
如果遇上了你的白马王子,一定要清晰地表明你的爱意,告诉他你期待下一次的约会。 

      告诉他你希望你们还会电话联系,希望还有下一次见面。不要过多地考虑未来的不确定因素。今天有酒今天醉!如果失败了,也没有必要责怪网络虚拟爱情这玩意。只是刚好际遇不佳而已了。但是,如果你们现在在约会,好好了解他,比较一下你约会的所有对象。这样的做法是有帮助的。
 
当你不局限于网络式约会的时候,你离成功也不远了。 

      试想一个这样的情景:在复印中心等待海量日常文件复印件的一男一女亲密交谈。他们亲昵耳语的景象很容易让人觉得他们或许能成为夫妻。其实如果你像以下我说的那样做,你离成功也不远了。在网络交流或者电话交谈的时候,花些时间、心思去验证一下他在你心中的形象。在你们正常交往前,你要好好了解他是不怎么可能的。但是尽量要互相交换一些关于你们朋友、家庭等等的信息。也就是说,尽量使网络约会现实一些。
告诉你身边的朋友:网络约会真的有效。 

      如果这段新的关系已经确立了,是时候谢谢那些建立交友网站的人了。当然,别忘了和其他的“朋友”说再见。恭喜你,网络约会的红线把你们给牵到一起了。三年前的一个周五的晚上,面对那个不断访问我的档案、对我表示出浓厚兴趣的男人,我决定冒险一试。虽然期间我们几乎要失去联系了。但是结果是美好的,现在我和他已经成为现实中的夫妻了。
 

(原文有些乱,这里的翻译是为了文章的美好结束进行的,如有误解请见谅。)