“ When I was 5 years old, my mom always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down ‘happy.’ They told me I didn’t understand the assignment and I told them they didn’t understand life.” — Anonymous
Make a List of 20 Things You Like to Do, And Then Do Them
In a video I found on YouTube the lecturer explains that if you don’t have a list of twenty things you like to do, then you don’t have a menu for being able to enjoy life. The list needs to include things that are fun, as well as things that give you a sense of accomplishment. Then every day you have to do some of the things that are on your list.
If your energy is low you might not feel like doing the items on your list. That is, your strategy might be to wait until your energy level is back up. However, you have to do the items on your list whether you feel like it or not. If you make yourself do it, if it’s something that you’ve enjoyed in the past, or something that has given you a sense of accomplishment in the past, there’s a good chance that you’ll enjoy it again, which will give you your energy back. So every day by intentionally doing things you enjoy– even if it’s petting your dog or drinking a cup of coffee–what you’re doing is building up your energy resources.
Happy People Don’t Watch a Lot of Television
An article published in the New York Times in November of 2008 explains that happy people don’t spend a lot of time watching television. The study was trying to identify what activities happy people engage in and they discovered an inverse relationship between hours of television watched and happiness. Even though researchers could not tell whether unhappy people watch more television or whether being glued to the TV set is what makes people unhappy, it’s safe to conclude that watching television is not conducive to happiness.
Pleasant Emotions: Elevation and Other Self-Transcending Emotions
I’ve written about positive psychology on this blog before: while psychology has long focused on what goes wrong, in the past decade there has been an explosion of interest in “positive psychology”—what makes us feel good and why. Now there is a word to describe a feeling that has always existed but has just moved out of the realm of philosophy and religion and been recognized as a distinct emotional state. It’s “elevation”, a term coined by University of Virginia psychologist Jonathan Haidt. (Source)
Elevation is the physical sensation that comes from witnessing goodness in others. It evokes in us a desire to become a better person, or to lead a better life. UC Berkeley psychologist Dacher Keltner is a pioneer in the study of elevation and he explains that it’s characterized by a warm, open, pleasant feeling, “liquid warmth in the chest and a lump in the throat.”
The emotion of elevation can be triggered by listening to great oratory, like Martin Luther King’s speech “I Have a Dream”; many people felt elevation on November 4th when they listened to Barack Obama’s victory speech. It can also be triggered by watching a stranger helping another stranger.
In Haidt’s article “Elevation and the Positive Psychology of Morality” he includes an anecdote from Thomas Jefferson’s life. In 1771 Jefferson’s friend Robert Skipwith wrote to him asking for advice on what books to buy for his library. Jefferson sent back a long list of titles in history, philosophy, and natural science. He also included some works of fiction and he justified this advice by pointing to the beneficial emotional effects of great fiction:
“[E]very thing is useful which contributes to fix us in the principles and practice of virtue. When any … act of charity or of gratitude, for instance, is presented either to our sight or imagination, we are deeply impressed with its beauty and feel a strong desire in ourselves of doing charitable and grateful acts also . . .
[I ask whether] the fidelity of Nelson, and generosity of Blandford in Marmontel do not dilate [the reader's] breast, and elevate his sentiments as much as any similar incident which real history can furnish? Does he not in fact feel himself a better man while reading them, and privately covenant to copy the fair example?”
Elevation is part of a family of self-transcending emotions. Other self-transcending emotions include:
- Awe: That sense of vastness of the universe that is often invoked by nature, art or music.
- Admiration: That goose-bump-making thrill that comes from seeing exceptional skill in action.
- Gratitude: That feeling of well-being that comes from the sense that we live in a world of bounty and generosity.
Keep the Secular Sabbath
Last Fall Mark Bittman, food columnist for “The New York Times”, began a self-imposed Saturday day of rest with much of the same no-work, no-electronics restrictions as the Jewish Sabbath. He was in desperate need of a day of real rest from technology, including his computer and the internet, the TV, as well as his cellphone. Since then the Secular Sabbath has been gaining traction among time-starved people who have begun to unplug one day a week. (Source)
Surround Yourself with Happy People
New research shows that happiness is indeed contagious. In a study published today in the British Medical Journal, Professors Nicholas Christakis and James Fowler from the University of California in San Diego have carried out research on the impact of social networks on happiness. They found that happiness really is contagious, and that it doesn’t really matter how many friends you have, but how happy they are and how close to you they live.
In addition, the researchers found that the merriment of one person can ripple out and cause happiness in people up to three degrees away: that is, if you’re happy, you increase the chance of joy in your close friend by 25%; a friend of that friend enjoys a 10% increased chance. And that friend’s friend has a 5.6% higher chance. So your level of happiness can affect the level of happiness of people you don’t even know. Here are several news sites that reported on this study:
photo credit: notsogoodphotography -
译文:
让你开心的5个快乐秘诀
“当我五岁的时候, 我妈妈总是对我说, 幸福是打开生活的钥匙.当我上学的时候,有人问我长大后想要干什么.我在纸上写下——快乐.他们说我没理解问题的含义,而我说,他们没体会到生活的真谛.”——佚名
列出你喜欢做的20件事情，然后去实施
我在youtube上看到一个影像，里面的讲师指出，如果你不在单子上列出你喜欢做的20件事情，这就意味着你没有能够享受生活，列单上包括一些有趣的，以及让你自己有满足感的的事情，然后你每天做一些列单上面的事情。
当你精神萎靡的时候，你可能不想做列单上的事情, 那些事情可能要等到你精神恢复的时候再做.但是,不管你喜欢与否, 你都要做清-列单上的事情.如果你迫使自己做了, 如果是以前做过的,或者,以前让你很有成就感的事情,那现在就是让你精神恢复的好机会.
快乐的人不会看太多的电视
纽约时报2008年11月发表的一篇文章指出快乐的人不会花费大量的时间看电视. 研究试图解释快乐的人参与怎样的活动. 他们发现幸福快乐与看电视所花的时间成反比例关系.即便如此, 研究人员仍无法解释为何不开心的人花费较多时间看电视, 也无法解释为什么电视使人们变得不开心.所以我们最好说看电视不利于感到快乐.
快乐的情绪：崇高和其他自我超越的情感
我之前在此博客上写过关于积极的心里影响：即便我们内心过久注重于什么不对劲了，在过去几十年里曾盛行积极心里——什么让我们感到开心，为什么。现在有一个词可以形容这样一直存在的感觉，但又刚刚脱离哲学和宗教领域，并被看作是一种独特的心理状态。这就是“崇高”，这个词由弗吉尼亚大学的心理学家乔纳森海德特创造的 （来源）
崇高就是一种看到他人的内在美而产生心理触动。它促动我们要变成更好的人，或者生活得更好。加州大学伯克利分校的心理学家Dacher Keltner 是研究崇高情感的先锋，他解释到崇高是一种热情、豪爽和舒适的感觉。“胸腔的暖流，如坐春风。”
崇高的情感可以通过听伟大的演讲去激发，如马丁路德金的演讲“我有一个梦想”；许多人在11月4日听奥巴马求职胜利演说时也是感到崇高激昂。当看到一个陌生人帮助另一个陌生人时也会产生崇高的敬意。
在海德特的文章“道德的崇高和积极心理学”里，他摘自托马斯杰克逊的一个生活片段。在1771年，杰克逊的朋友Robert Skipwith写信问他给予买什么书放在图书馆里。杰克逊在回信中列出一系列关于历史、哲学和自然科学的书目。他还列出一些著名小说，他指出这些建议的理由是这些小说能产生有益情绪影响的效果：
“[一切事情都都有助于我们让我们置身于崇尚美德的原则和实践。当任何 …比如， 慈善之举或是感激之举呈现在我们眼前或是我们想象力中，我们都被其的美而受到深刻触动，并有种强烈的愿望希望自己也做慈善和感谢的行为 . . .
[我问是否]纳尔逊的真诚，布兰德福德的慷慨在Marmontel没有扩大[读者]的胸怀,并提升他的感情,正如真实历史所提供同样的事例一样高?难道他不觉得自己在阅读时自己是更好的人,并私下承诺要想学习这的好例子?"
崇高是一种自我超越情感的一部分.其他自我超越情感包括:
- 敬畏:通常由自然,艺术或是音乐唤起对宇宙的一种广阔的感觉.
- 钦佩: 那种雀跃的兴奋来自于我们看见在行为中所呈现出异常能力.
- 感激:这种幸福感觉来自于我们感到自己生活在一个慷慨大方的世界.
保持世俗的安息日
去年秋天，“纽约时报” 食品专栏作家马克比特曼,开始给自己强加一个星期六休息日,正如犹太教的安息日一样,没有工作、没有电子产品的限制。他迫切需要一天休息的时间，让自己真正从技术，其中包括他的电脑和互联网，电视，以及他的手机解放出来。从那以后，世俗安息日让那些每周抽调一天休息的时间紧迫的人获得牵引。（来源）
置身于快乐人群周围
新研究表明，幸福是蔓延的。在一份发表在英国医学期刊的研究报告，来自美国加州大学圣迭戈的尼古拉斯克里斯塔基斯和詹姆斯福勒教授已经调查研究社会网络的幸福的影响。他们发现，快乐是蔓延的，它并不取决于你有多少朋友，而是你的朋友有多开心和他们和你煮的和你有多近。
此外，研究人员发现，一个人快乐可以让周围人产生快乐，这快乐有3层连续反应以上：那就是说，如果你高兴，你将增加你亲密朋友快乐的机会高达25%、；你那些朋友又让他们的朋友增加10%的快乐几率。同时那朋友的朋友也有高达5.6%的快乐机会。所以，你快乐的程度可能会影响你甚至不知道的人的幸福的程度：
photo credit: notsogoodphotography -