Danger lurks everywhere. I’m not talking about health risks or economic downturns, I’m talking about human predators. Most people are good human beings, but there are some who are not. They are dangerous and hunt for victims. The good news is that you can keep yourself safe by following seven simple safety rules.
I’m a 4th Dan Karate Black Belt and learned these seven safety rules during eighteen years of martial arts training. The safety rules are simple, because as human beings, we have a built-in warning system that alerts us to predator danger. This warning system is called fear. Yes, fear is our greatest ally in keeping ourselves safe.
The problem is that our natural warning system has become blunted through easy living. We’ve lost our natural ability to keep ourselves safe. Before I guide you through the seven safety strategies, let me say something about a key safety issue.
Don’t be an easy victim
Predators always go for easy victims. I’m not just talking about big crimes, but also of daily aggression, such a bullying. I remember the time my son Sebastian came home from school and told me that he was being bullied by an older boy. Sebastian was seven years old at the time and had just started karate training. He grew up in a Zen household where peacefulness is valued, so he was confused about how to respond to bullying. Here is what he asked me:
“Mum, if someone hits me, do I just have to take it and not hurt them back?”
“Here’s what to do, Sebastian,” I said. “When the bully threatens you, stand up straight and hold both hands out in front of your chest, palms toward him, and say ‘stop!’ in a loud voice.”
“Why do I hold my hands like that?”
“The open hands in front of you show that you want peace, as well as warning your opponent not invade to your personal space. And, most importantly – you’ve got your hands in place, ready to defend or punch.”
“What? To punch?” His eyes grew round.
“Yes. You need to study your opponent carefully. Wait until he’s just getting ready to throw a punch. Then get in first and punch him on the nose. I promise he’ll never attack you again.”
Sebastian followed my advice. Next day he punched his tormentor just as I had suggested. The kids at school were impressed when they saw the big bully run away crying. I must admit, the headmaster wasn’t so pleased with my strategy, but Sebastian was never bullied again.
He reminded me of my advice a short while ago. “That wasn’t exactly what a peace-loving mother is supposed to say,” he said. “But it worked!”
Remember: never be an easy victim.
7 safety rules that can save your life
1. Be alert
I’m not talking about hyper-vigilance here. Just pay attention to what is around you. Think of all the times you walk around in a day dream, or preoccupied with your problems. Those are the times when you are in danger. Because keeping yourself safe is a matter of paying attention to possible danger and avoiding it.
Keep your wits around you at all times. That means avoid getting drunk or drugged. When you’re inebriated, you turn into an easy victim.
2. Use your senses
When our forebears still lived in caves, the senses were essential survival tools. Smell could signal the approach of a dangerous animal, or lead to a food source. Hearing could alert to a predator creeping up, ready to attack. Taste could discern poisonous food.
These days our sense are blunted and we’ve forgotten to use them in order to keep ourselves safe. Let me give you an example: many people walk through streets listening to music on their iPods. What that means is that someone can easily creep up from behind and attack. I suggest that you never listen to music while walking in order to stay alert to your surrounding.
3. Notice anomalies
Impending danger often shows up in anomalies. What I’m talking about is predators often behave in odd ways. Let me give you some examples. At the time of writing, I’m in Buenos Aires, which has a rising crime rate, due to growing poverty. At times, my partner and I have to walk though streets that are less than safe. Here are anomalies I watch out for:
- A couple or small group coming towards you whose attention is on you, and not on each other.
Normally a couple or a small group are focused on each other, talking and looking at each other. In contrast, predators hunting in packs are focused on possible victims.
- People lurking or loitering without visible reason.
Here’s an example: a few weeks ago my partner won a couple of thousand Dollars playing lotto. When he checked his ticket in the store, the win caused a bit of a stir and the store owner paid him out in cash. I quickly took stock of the situation and noticed that two of the guys who had been behind us in the queue were loitering outside the shop. So I immediately chose the back exit to get us home safely.
- People whose face or gait spells out severe mental illness.
Severe mental disturbance shows in the face and in the gait of a person. For example, a normal person uses diagonal movements when walking: we swing the left arm when the right leg moves forward, and so on. People with severe mental illness often walk with parallel movements, i.e., the right arm and right leg move forward.
Research has shown that we instinctively pick up such anomalies. Take note of your feelings of unease or fear and act upon them without delay. The best way to stay safe is to spot oncoming danger and avoid or evade it.
4. Avoid angry scenes and ugly crowds.
If you are at a club or a party and aggravation builds, leave the place immediately. If you are in a large crowd and the mood turns ugly, quickly move to the edge of the crowd and leave the area.
The word ‘immediately’ is a key to keeping yourself safe. Often you will be tempted to ‘wait and see’. Or someone will say to you, “You’re over-reacting!” To keep safe, you have to give your instinct for danger priority, no matter what others say, or what your mind thinks. Your marker for danger is fear. Take good note of any feelings of disquiet or fear and act upon them.
5. Keep together
I’m sure you have seen videos of lions hunting in the wild. They never attack the leaders of a herd. They attack the stragglers. Human predators follow the same strategy, they target people who are on their own. Make sure to keep up when moving across town with another person or a group. Don’t fall behind, and don’t get separated.
6. Look big and show confidence
I’m sure you’ve seen what cats do when they see a strange dog. They fluff up their fur and appear twice their size. If you sense danger, you need to do the same. Make sure your posture is upright. Let your arms swing by your sides but hold them away from your body a little in order to create a bigger profile.
If you are feeling threatened, walk fast and confidently. If you are lost in a foreign city, never stop and study a map under a street lamp – it marks you as a possible victim. It’s better to go into a restaurant or club in order to find your directions. Always appear in charge of your actions.
7. Treat people well
If you are aggressive or nasty to others, they may respond with aggression or even violence towards you. Your best defense against danger is to be a friendly and helpful person.
Safety is also heightened through knowledge. Make sure that you know which areas are dangerous and avoid them. Stick to larger streets with foot traffic, even if it takes longer to get to where you want to go.
If you follow these seven safety rules, you will have a good chance of keeping yourself safe. And they won’t make you into a nervous or suspicious person. Your heightened alertness will enable you to be more relaxed and less tense.
Finally, martial arts training – even for a short time – is a great way to learn not only how to defend yourself, but how to spot and avoid danger. It also gives you the self-confidence to know that you’re worth defending.
The unexpected outcome of good martial art training is that it turns you into a peaceful person. The ultimate key to safety is to radiate peacefulness whilst staying alert.
Mary Jaksch is an author, Zen Master, and psychotherapist who likes dancing tango in skimpy dresses. Her blogGoodlife Zen focuses on personal growth for intelligent people. Get her FREE eBook Overcome Anything: Finding Light after Darknessclick here. Mary is also Chief Editor of Leo Babauta’s blog Write to Done
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译文:
如何识别即将发生的危险：七个重要的安全法则
危险无处不在。然在这我要谈论的不是健康隐患与经济衰退问题，而是人中的恶棍。当然我们中大多数人是好的，但也有一些败类。他们本性凶残好滋扰生事伤及无辜。有幸的是，按照下面七个安全法则行事可保你平安。
我是一位空手道四段练武者，十八年的武术操练生涯让我学会了这些安全法则。其实说来也简单，因为作为人类，与生俱来的警示系统能提醒我们去避免伤害。而这个警示系统就是敬畏之心。没错，心怀敬畏是我们保护自己安全的最好盟友。
但我们的自然警示系统在安逸的生活中已经钝化，我们失去了保护自己安全的天生能力。在向你细说七个安全策略之前，请允我先谈一个重要的安全问题。
不做易受伤害的人
恶棍们常喜欢欺负那些看似羸弱的人。抛开大的犯罪案件不谈，就是日常生活中也时常会发生些侵犯行为，如恐吓。我记得有次我儿子塞巴斯蒂安放学回家告诉我说他被一个大男孩欺负了。当时的塞巴斯蒂安只有七岁，空手道也才开始学。他是在信仰禅宗的家庭里长大的，打小起就被教导与人要和平相处。因此，在受到欺负时，他不知怎么应对。他是这样问我的：
“妈妈，如果有人打我，我就得忍受，而不给他们反击吗？”
我说，“塞巴斯蒂安，你可以这样做” 。 “当受到欺凌时，两脚保持并立，将双手放在胸前，掌心朝他，并大声喊 '停住！。“
“为什么我的手要那样做呢？”
“将手放在胸前并摊开意味着你是在显示友好，同时它也是在警告你的敌人不要侵犯你的个人空间。而且，最重要的是 – 因你手势的到位，能随时做好自卫、出击的准备。“
“什么? 出击?” 他的眼睛睁得大大的.
“是的。你需要仔细研究你的对手。并耐心等待，在他意欲攻击你时，第一时间用力猛击他的鼻子。我保证，他再也不敢欺负你了。“
塞巴斯蒂安接受了我的建议。第二天按照我告诉他的方法将欺负他的人揍了一顿。当学校的孩子们看到大个的男孩哭着逃跑时。他们都无不赞佩塞巴斯蒂安。我必须承认的是，校长对我的教导方法不甚满意，但塞巴斯蒂安确实没有再被欺负了。
针对我的建议，他方才提醒我。他说 “这确实不是一个爱好和平的母亲应该说的话，” “但它非常凑效！
记住: 永远不要做易受伤害的人。
保存你生活的七个安全法则
1. 时刻警惕
当然这里我讲的不是要你保持高度的警惕状态。但对周围的事物你需要留意。如果你成天在想着一些不切实际的问题，或只专注于你个人的某些事情。麻烦就会来的。因为保护个人安全需要你能识别即将发生的危险以及怎样去规避它们。
任何时侯你应保持警觉。不要酗酒或去吸毒。因为一旦喝醉，你就可能变成一个易受伤害的人。
2. 运用你的感官
当我们的祖先还住在洞穴里的时候，感官是维持生存的必要工具。嗅觉能闻出附近危险动物的气息，帮助去寻找食物的来源。听觉可以识别来袭的猛兽，让人做好攻击的准备。而味觉可以分辨出有毒的食品。
现在我们的这些感官已经退化，不能再靠它来保护自己的安全。我给你举个例子：很多人走在大街上的时候喜欢听音乐。这也就意味着，他很容易被人从后面袭击。我的建议是，走在路上的时候不要去听音乐应洞察周围的环境。
3. 注意异常情况
即将发生的危险通常存在着某些异常。恃强欺弱者一般行为举止都怪异。我给你举个例子。在写这篇文章时，我住在布宜诺斯艾利斯，这个城市因日益严重的贫困问题犯罪率颇高。但有时候，我与我的搭档也不得不走在存在安全隐患的街道上，我觉察到的异常现象有：
- 两个或者是一小伙人朝你走来时，他们的注意力不在彼此却在你身。
而正常情况下是两个或一小伙人走在一起的时候，他们的注意力只在对方身上，彼此相互交谈与互相凝视的。反而言之，你就可能成为恶棍们重点下手的受害者。
下面是一个例子：数个星期前，我的搭档买彩票中了几千美元。当他在投注站核对票据时，因为中奖引起了店里的一阵轰动，店子老板在支付他现金时。我快速的扫视了一下现场的环境，发现先前排在我们后面的两个家伙在店外徘徊。于是，我立马决定我们从后面的出口回家。
患严重心理困扰的人面部表情与走路的形态跟常人不同。例如，正常人行走时步态呈对角线：即当右腿向前迈进时我们的左臂会跟着摆动，等等。而患有严重精神病的人行走时走的是平步路，换言之，他的右脚向前时右手也前摆。
研究表明，我们的直觉能辨别这些异常。因此请留意自己的不安或恐惧情绪并立即应对它们。保持安全的最好办法就是即时发现出将到来的危险，并成功避免或回避。
4. 远离不愉快的场面和邪恶之徒。
如果你此刻还在俱乐部或聚会上，及其它能引发矛盾的场所，请立即离开这些地方。如果你处在一大堆人群之中，而现场气氛恶化的时候，记得迅速移动到人群的边缘并离开这个地方。
'立即' 这个词是你保持安全的关键。而通常情况下你会‘静观待其果'。 有些人还可能会跟你说，“你反应过敏啦！” 为安全起见，你务必提高警惕，不管他人会说什么，你的脑袋里想什么。面对危险人总会心怀敬畏。 因此请充分留意任何能引起你不安或恐惧的情绪并积极采取行动。
5. 呆在一起
我相信你肯定看过狮子野外狩猎的影片。狮子们从不攻击领头的那只动物。它们攻击的对象是掉队者。人类中的恶棍也同样如此，他们下手的目标是那些独立行事的人。因此走在城市的街道上时请务必找一个人或者更多的人陪伴。不要落在后面，不要走分散。
6. 大块头与信心展示
我相信你看过猫在敌逢陌生狗时的应急场面。它们竖起的绒毛能让其体型看起来呈平常两倍大小。如果你遇到危险的时候，你也应该这样做。保持身体姿势端正，手臂在身体两侧摆动，但手臂要与身体相隔一定的距离来增加自己的块头。
如果你感到自己身受威胁，那就请走快些同时保持乐观自信的心情。如果你在一个陌生的城市迷失了方向，请不要停下脚步或到路灯下面去看地图–因为这会使你成为可能的受害者。最好的方法是进一家餐厅或俱乐部来辨别方向。时刻留意自己的一举一动。
7. 待人友好
如果你对他人挑衅或不礼貌的话，他们可能会还之挑衅甚至对你施暴。应对危险你最好的方法就是待人友好和乐于助人。
安全也可通过不断的学识来提高。但务必要弄清楚哪些地方是危险的，然后采取办法来避开它们。尽量往人多的大街上走，哪怕是你要花更多的时间才能到达目的地。
如果你遵循了这七个法则，你就能更好的保护自己的安全。他们也不会让你难堪或对你产生怀疑。警觉性的提高会使你备感轻松，深感安逸。
最后，武术操练– 即使是练习的时间不长 – 也是一个很好的学习方法，它不仅能让你学会如何保护自己，而且它还能告诉你怎样去发现与规避危险。同时它还能让你产生自信，让他人知道你并不是好惹的。
习武最大的好处是它能让你成为一个心态平和的人。 保持安全的最后之键是自己在提高警惕的同时向他人传递友好的信息。
玛丽·杰克斯是一位作家，禅师，兼心理治疗医生，她喜欢穿着短裙跳探戈舞。 她的博客 禅宗好生活旨在关注聪明人的个人成长。想得到她免费的电子书《克服万难: 黑暗之后是光明》请点击这里. 同时玛丽也是利奥·班巴塔博客Write to Done的总编辑。