Each year we all gather as a species and proclaim some heroic
New Year's resolutions. Sadly enough, hardly any of these resolutions ever
make it out of the drawing room. The good news is, you don't have to wait until the end of the year in order to take a step in the right direction.
I believe that the domain of our lives is much like the Parthenon, a tremendous structure supported by 10 crucial pillars. You may survive without one of them, maybe two, but if you're running on too many low or missing pillars, your structure is in danger of collapsing.
"Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain, and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams." ~Ashley Smith
- Health & Fitness
Are you significantly overweight for your height/weight ratio? I definitely am. It's not easy to maintain that target weight when you're busy working, traveling, or dating a very good cook! However, it's our mission to take steps toward our goals, even if they're very little steps.
The best thing to do is to take your brain out of the equation by creating a set of rules for your diet. This way, when the question of 'to cake or not to cake' comes up, you'll simply refer to the rule of 'big fat no.' I've currently set up several such weight loss rules and it's working well so far. Remember, exercise is the key to life!
- Mental development & Education
Your mental development does not necessarily have to be tied into your degree. While I have a BA in psychology and MS in biomedical science, the great majority of what I know in life comes from experience, what I've read, and people that I've talked to.
It's important that you identify what you're mental development goals are and then go to the library or internet and self-study on all of those topics. The topics that you'll find most useful for a well-rounded life are psychology, motivation, success, productivity, career development, problem solving, health, wealth, conscious living, and spirituality. You can branch out from here.
- Work, Career, & Finances
Your job is your home away from home, and your co-workers are your secondary-family. It's crucial to be in love with what you do, to the point that you get up in the morning and go to 'fun' instead of going to 'work.' There is a career for everyone out there, and it is possible to make money doing what you love.
While I'm currently not the best person to be giving advice on money management (I'm working on this one as well), I do know the fundamentals. Save enough for a rainy day, don't spend all your money in one place, and live below your means. If you live under your means you can get into any career you want and thrive.
- Social life & Relationships
This is probably the strongest area of my personal life. Several principles allowed me to be in an amazing relationship and have truly great friends by my side. I realized that there's no changing people. Option 1 is to accept highly flawed people and put a tremendous amount of work into the upkeep and survival of these relationships. Option 2 is to find people with really great character and personality traits and put the same amount of energy into boosting these relationships into the stratosphere.
Just like with any other area of life, you reap what you sow. Notice how both of the options above demand a high level of energy and effort on our parts. It's also important to put that energy into a few people, let's call these your 'dream team' of friends. For years I was the person that knew everybody but wasn't close to anybody. All my effort was spread amongst the hordes instead of creating life-long bonds (still putting more effort on this, and it's paying off!)
- Home & Family
The thing about your family life is that you can't really exercise option 2 from #4. You can't choose a different family that is everything you ever dreamed of. You're kind of stuck with who you've got. With that said, you might need to put all your effort into merely surviving them.
In my experience the more work I do on myself, without worrying what the family is up to, the more fulfilling I find those relationships. The key word here is acceptance, and it's something I'm going to be reminding myself of for the rest of my life! Having a delicious relationship with the people you love is absolutely instrumental to you have the best possible life that you can.
- Character, Integrity, Ethics & Virtues
This is the essence of who you are. If you're going to get anywhere in any of the other areas of your life you need to have the right framework. Integrity sits as the foundation of your character, and your ethics & virtues make the foundation even stronger. Everything else gets built on top of this.
Think of yourself as a big square stone. The real you is a beautiful sculpture within this stone. It's going to take a life time of chiseling away, little by little, at this big stone in order to uncover the true you. The true you is the character that shines through even if no one is looking.
- Emotion control & development
Even the strongest, most logical people are susceptible to emotional blockades. Emotions have the ability to create bottle necks in our experience of life. If you're a violently angry person, you might have the genius to excel at your job, but your disposition will not allow you to work well with others and be a valuable contributing member to the overall benefit of your team.
Fear is another emotion that holds people back from getting a full experience of life. Read about emotional control, practice it, and talk to people that have a great sense of when they should cry and when they should laugh. You'll be able to harness the power of emotions and use them to greatly amplify the efforts you are taking towards our goals.
- Daily habits & routines
There are some things in life that don't need to take up mental RAM, and would actually work out better if we didn't have to think about them. Our diet is one of them as I already mentioned, but other things such as our morning routines, exercise routines, our writing patterns and our commutes to work, don't deserve to be given a second thought once we've mastered them.
Set up as many habits and routines as you believe are practical for your own life. Having a general wake up routine, then have another one for when you wake up late, and yet another one for the weekends. Eliminate the time wasted when you dilly dally around thinking about what your next action should be. Then when it comes to being fun and spontaneous with the people you love, drop the routines and have fun!
- Life purpose & contribution
The big question is what are you living for? Many people come to my site looking for suicide advice, and I think the number one reason that people consider it is a lack of a firm grasp on their life purpose. Even if you aren't suicidal there's still a huge difference between getting the maximum out of life and surviving a comfortable existence.
The trick to getting the maximum out of life is within the contribution part. Contribution is about giving the maximum to life. This means being a person that brings large amounts of value into this world, for proper compensation of course. I believe it's the people with the big purpose and goal, that actively pursue and achieve, that are able to enjoy life to the fullest.
- Spiritual development
I'm personally in limbo on my spiritual development. I recently explored orthodox-Judaism, and while much of it resonated with me, I ended up dropping the exploration of this extreme. It's important to realize that spiritual development and religion are not necessarily one and the same.
The essence of spiritual development is rising to a higher-state of consciousness and seeking out the truth in your everyday life. By tapping into this energy you'll be able to relieve stress, find peace, and focus better on the important areas of your life.
The underlying goal behind all of these pillars should be to maintain a balance and reap maximum pleasure from each area of your life. You'll notice that as you reach such balance each pillar will help you in your personal growth. Have a
great day!
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Alex
译文:
生活中10个需要提升的领域
每年我们一群人都会聚在一起，然后很自豪的说出自己的新年决议。然而，令人伤心的是这些豪言壮语几乎无一实现了。但有个好消息，你不必再等到年末的时候才能朝着正确的方向迈一步。
我一直认为，就像帕台农神庙由十个擎天大柱支撑着一般，我们的生活也有十个重要的需要支援的领域。或许没有了其中的一个或者两个，我们还依然能够存活，但是如果结构当中参差不齐的太严重或者缺失了很多，那么整个结构将毁之一旦。
“生活是美好的。用心去感受生活吧。看看繁忙嘈杂的人群，可爱的小孩，灿烂的笑脸。享受下微风轻拂，雨中夹杂着泥土芬芳的清新。发掘生活的无限可能性，为你的梦想而奋斗。”~阿什利 斯密斯
1.健康&瘦身
按照身高体重比例来讲，你属于严重超重人群吗？我就是其中一员。当我们工作繁忙，在度假或者面对美食时，想要要保持理想的体重是件很困难的事情。然而，我们必须得朝着那个目标不断前进，对此我们责无旁贷，尽管可能每次都只会是一小步。
最好的方法是，控制饮食，摆脱头脑中原来认为的吃什么都一样的思想。这样，当面临是吃蛋糕呢还是不要这样的问题时，你就会条件反射般的想到自己的规定“拒绝高脂”。我最近就制定了一些规定来帮助减肥，到目前为止，效果还不错。但记住，生命在于运动。
2.智力发展&教育
智力的发展程度和你的学历并没有什么必然的关系。尽管我取得了心理学学士学位，生物科学硕士学位，但我所知道的东西中，绝大部分是来自我的生活经验，课外阅读以及我所交往的人们。
首先明确自己的目标，然后去图书馆或者上网对所有的内容进行自主学习，这点是很重要的。在追求完美生活的过程中，对哲学，动力，成功，生产力，职业发展，处理问题，健康，财富，清明的生活以及精神问题的深入思考，无疑会有很益的帮助。
3.工作，职业&财政
当你踏出家门后，你的工作的地方就是你的家，同事也就是你的第二家庭成员。能真正喜欢你自己的工作是很重要的，因为这样从某个角度来说你每天早上起来之后是去进行享受的而不是乏味的工作。每个人都能找到适合自己的职业，也能通过做自己喜欢的事来赚钱。
就目前来说，在理财方面，尽管我还不能给出最好的建议（我也正在从事这方面的研究）但我也知道一些最基本的原则。未雨绸缪，不要将你所有的钱都花在一个地方，你的开支也要小于你的收入。如果你能合理支配你的收入，你就能做任何你想做的工作并且获得成功。
4.社交生活&人际关系
这个可能是私人生活中所占分量最大的一个领域。根据几条基本的原则，我置身于错综复杂的人际网中，并且收获到了真正的友情。每个人都是不可替换的。我们要做的第一点就是学会包容别人的缺点，多花些精力去维持这些关系，使其能得以生存。第二点就是去寻找一些真正的品性高尚的人，花上同等的精力去经营和他们之间的关系，并使他达到一个更高的层次。
和生活中的其他任何一个领域一样，你做出了怎样的付出就会有怎样的回报。上面提出的两点都要求我们要投入很大的精力和心力。但我们还得将同样的精力花在另一部分少部分群体的人身上，我们把这些人成为“梦之队”朋友。
5.家&家庭
对于家庭生活，你并不能行使期权。你没有办法选择你的家庭，期望你所在的家庭就是你想象中的样子。或许从某种意义上，现在和你呆在一起的人在某种程度上牵绊住了你。如果是这样，可能仅仅是为了使他们能够生活下去，你就得花上你全部的精力。
从我的经验来看，我亲自做的事情越多，至于家里其他人干什么不去干涉太多，家庭关系就越和谐。在这里，学会接受是很重要的，在我的余生之中，我也将不停的提醒我自己记住这一点。和你所爱的人保持良好的关系，对你能够拥有理想的生活是很有指导意义的。
6.品格，正直，道德伦理&美德
你究竟是怎样的一个人，这些品质是判断的关键。不管你到生活中的哪个领域，你都得把握住关键之所在。诚实正直乃善性之根本，良好的道德则又会为它锦上添花。其他很多事物都是构筑在其上的。
将你自己想象成一块方砖。而真正的你是这块方砖上的雕刻品。你需要一点一点的小心雕刻这块方砖，它代表的就是你的一生。真正的你，身上应该拥有一种品质，无论在哪里，它都能闪闪发光，即便没有人注意到你。
7.情绪的控制&发展
一个人再理性，逻辑行再强，也容易受到情绪的困扰。情绪的波动会使我们的生活陷入一个瓶颈期。
如果你易怒，喜暴力，那么或许你在你的工作上很有天赋，但是你的性情却阻碍你，使你不能很好的和别人合作，不能为这个团队带来好处。
恐惧是另一给生活带来影响的情绪。读一些关于情绪控制方面的书，并将之加以实践。此外，和那些知道该如何控制情绪（知道何时笑何时哭)的人多接触接触。这样你才能拥有足够的能力驾驭你的情绪，让他们为了你的目标更好的服务。
8.日常习惯&日常工作
生活中有些事情并没有排在我们的固定日程中，而且往往我们不去对它做太多考虑的时候，效果往往更好。我们的日常饮食就属于刚刚提到的那一类。但是其他一些东西，如我们的早上的生活习惯，日常的锻炼计划，写作方式以及工作方式，一旦形成了而且我们也习惯了，就不要想太多，不要再试图去改变什么。
多培养建立一些你认为会对你的生活有帮助的习惯和常规。设立一个一般起床时间，另外再有一套方案为你偶尔的晚起做备用，然后在为你的周末生活制定一个。不要为你下一步该做什么而磨磨蹭蹭的，减少这些浪费的时间。但是当你是在和你爱的一起娱乐之时，就将这些抛到脑后去，尽情的享受吧！
9.生活目标&贡献
很严肃的一个问题是：你活着究竟是为了什么？很多人来我的网站，来寻求自杀提醒，我想这些人会考虑自杀，第一个原因就是因为他们对生活的目的缺少一个严密的认识。尽管或许你没有想过要自杀，是拥有一个极致精彩的人生还是就这样过着一个平庸的生活，两者之间还是有很大的区别的。
令人感到戏剧性的是，不管你从生活中获得了多少，也终归小于你的贡献。贡献就是将你能给的全都最大程度的交给生活。这就意味着一个人给这个世界带来巨大的价值，而因此得到了适当的报酬。我相信，那些有着这样的目标并将之付诸实践的人，会享受到最幸福的人生。
10.精神发展
我个人已经处于一个精神发展的状态。我最近在探究正统犹太教，尽管我和当中的很多都产生了共鸣，但我最终还是放弃了。精神发展和宗教并不一定就是一回事，我觉得认识到这一点是很重要的。
精神发展的核心在于使自己的觉悟达到一个更高的层次，寻求生活的真谛。有了这样的能力，你就能更好的面对压力，变得祥和，更好的面对你生活的其他重要领域。
隐藏在这些方法之下的，其最根本的目的还是帮你维持一个平和的生活，从中享受到最大的快乐。你会发现，当你达到这种平衡时，这其中的每个领域都会帮助你取得你个人的成长。一定要每天快乐哦~