我曾经很爱看名人传记，关于一切杰出的传奇女性。后来我发现她们的共性，无论她们已经在后人的神话里尊崇到了什么地位，但是她们依然被描述成孩子气的，兴致勃勃的，一双眼睛闪闪发光的。无论是Coco Chanel还是奥黛丽赫本，抑或者她们是如何幸福美满还是特立独行，她们骨子里那种致命的吸引力来自女人特质与孩童纯真混合之后的韵味。
爱情，是女人生命中最璀璨的烟花。因为爱情，我们成长和成熟，寻找到幸福和安宁。没有一个幸福的女人是不相信爱情的。假如篡改Chanel女士的名言，那就是：“爱人来了又去，但爱情永存”。可是如今，就经常有姑娘一屁股坐在我对面的沙发上，叼着一根烟说：“男人没TMD一个好东西。”一瞬间，我在她的脸上看见了沧海桑田。
“男人没有一个好东西”这句话，我最早是在八点档乡土肥皂剧里见到被频频提起的。通常都是一个久经沧桑的大婶劝慰一个哭哭啼啼的小媳妇儿用的经典台词，无论是出轨还是家暴，说出这句话的意思就是忍了吧反正天下乌鸦一般黑，换个人也未必好到哪里去。不过我身边也有不少女友会将这句话挂在嘴边，通常是在她们遭遇了一段又一段的不靠谱恋情之后的总结。可是她们的意思是，既然男人都这么不靠谱了，那么我干脆也开始游戏人生好了。
所以，我将这句话列为女人禁语第一句。虽然有时并不是自己的错，在一段感情中对男人也颇有怨怼，但爱情本身就很难用理性来衡量，无非就是妥协磨合或转身离开。这句话一旦出口，则总让其他人感觉到“阅人无数”。你又何必将自己描述成风尘中打滚却屡败屡战的女人呢？假如真有一个一直在默默喜欢你的男人听到了这句话，他又怎么可能相信你还是一个可以认真对待的女人？那些失败的经历，默默收藏起来都将成为财富，它会教给你下一段感情要如何对待和珍惜，何必将自己打扮成无比沧桑阅尽人间不相信真爱的嘴脸？
很多女孩子就是吃了口无遮拦的亏。其实她们骨子里还是单纯的，却忍不住扮滚滚红尘状，目的我也明白是为了保护自己，可，这只会叫好男人却步坏男人钻空。所以有些话真的是女人的禁语，轻易不能说出口的。
第二句当属亦舒师太在《喜宝》里的那句名言，同样被很多女子惆怅的引用：“我要很多很多爱，假如没有的话，就要很多很多钱。”可是，就算真的是心声也万万不能说出口。男人怎知你真的是要爱还是要钱，更何况无爱的话，凭什么他会给你钱？难道最终也落得个喜宝般包养境地吗？第三句则是坊间流传不知真伪的王菲名言：“既然男人都一样，不如选个帅的”。这种语境也总会让人感慨万千，简直是“天下男人没有一个好东西”的翻版。虽然我承认这也是“女性主张”的一部分，但，你在没能传奇之前，还是在心里默默的念叨就好，还是不要讲出口来比较好，男人会觉得，你太小看他的智商了，以及，人家还没精虫上脑到这个地步。
还有一句经常被提及的话是：“与其找个我爱的，不如找个爱我的”。无论是不是感情受挫，在某个时刻女人总有种爱得太过辛苦的感慨，只是到最后是否贪图苟且省事，寻一个穷小子来爱慕公主这样的爱情桥段，就不知道是不是可以欣然接受了。可，我只是想说，我只是想说：女人之所以是女人，不是公主，不是风尘艳女，就不要轻易说出以上的言语。因为男人不是奴隶，不是傻子。谁家也不缺个祖宗来供奉。假如没有爱，那么就算给你一切，又有什么用？假如没有爱，为什么他们还要给你那一切？所以，请记住，有些言语轻易不能吐露，记住你还未曾沧桑。
译文:
Never experienced vicissitudes of life
Once upon a time, I loved to read all celebrity biographies about outstanding legend females. I found later that they had something in common that they still could be described as childish, goodhumoured with sparkling eyes, no matter what high position they got in the eyes of their posterities. Coco Chanel or Audrey Hepburn, whatever how happy or different they were, the fatal attraction in their bones derived from the lasting appeal which mixed traits of female with naivete of children.
Love, is considered as the most brilliant fireworks in the lives of women. We grew up and matured, got hold of happiness and peace because of love. None of women who immersed in happiness would doubt of love. One saying of Mrs. Chanel after tampered should be:”People we have loved came and went, but only the love still.” While recently, there was a girl flopped down on the sofa opposite to me, with a cigarette in her mouth:”Man is none of fucking good things.” Just at that moment, I discovered something vicissitudes from her face.
Refers to “Man is none of fucking good things”, I heard it before frequently from the local soap opera on the eight time program in the morning. It usually was used as a classic line for an aunt who has experienced vicissitudes of her life to console a crying girl. Whatever there was an affair or family violence, when it came out, it implied that you’d better bear with it, because none of men was different even if you left this man and came to another. There were girls around me loved to say the same words too, which they thought it could be the conclusion of illusory relationships after experienced again and again. What they really mean was it is rather fine with me to have a good time than to trust in men again.
As a result, I ranked this word top on the women’s inhibition words list. It was not their fault, and they also got resentments to men within a relationship, but it is really hard to judge love by sense, and the only result was to compromise or break up. Once when this word came out, it always brought people a feeling of “read person’s innumerable’. Was there any need to pretend as a woman who wallowed through time’s dust but fight repeatedly after suffering repeated defeats? What if the man who loved you silently all the time heard this word, how could he still believe you are the one he should take seriously? Those failure experiences will turn to be fortune by collected stilly, and it will teach you how to treasure your next relationship, therefore why should pretend yourself as the one who experienced vicissitudes and doubted of love?
Many girls suffered losses by outspoken. They were still naïve actually, but cannot help pretending experienced; I really could understand that they intended to protect themselves, while with the result to scare away good guys and provide chances for bad guys. So there should be some inhibition words for women to speak out readily.
The second saying came from “Xi Bao”, written by Yishu, which was quoted by many girls either: “I long for love, otherwise lots of money.” However, it was wrong to say it out even if you thought in that way. How could men really know what you need more, love or money? What’s more, why should they give you money without if he doesn’t love you? Or you are willing to be trapped in the same situation as Xi Bao who was someone’s mistress? The third saying came from Wang Fei which spread over people without being proved:”Since the men were all the same, it would be better to choose a handsome one.” This word always brought us into a situation that flooding with emotion; there was no different with “Man is none of fucking good things”. Even though I have to admit it as a part of “female freedom”, it is rather much better to meditate silently than to speak it out before you turn to be a big shot, because men will believe that you looked down on their intelligence quotient, moreover, they won’t be so impulsive.
Another saying which referred often was:”Rather better to find someone I love than someone loves me”. No matter getting hurt in a relationship or not, women always felt love still was a hard thing in a certain moment; till the last it was hard to say that whether women could accept that kind of love plot to find a poor guy to adore princess, just because they desired things to be simple. However, what I just want to say is: woman who she is, not a princess, nor an attractive seductress, better not to come out with those words readily. Men are not a slave, nor fool. Each family has their own ancestor for oblation. Would anything you get make any sense without love? Why should they give you everything without love? Therefore, just remember, there are some words you cannot speak out easily, because you have never experienced many vicissitudes of life.