Just as we saw the collapse of torture porn in 2007, we are very likely seeing the collapse of the spoof movie in 2008.
On one hand, it’s a shame. I like a good spoof movie. Mel Brooks did several in the 70s and 80s. The ZAZ crew gave us Airplane! and Top Secret. Keenan Ivory Wayans jump-started the trend most recently with Scary Movie.
Then those blasted two of the six writers of Scary Movie – Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer – got a few hits. And what was once a clever and fun genre has turned into a trough of utter crap.
Now, their latest film – quite possibly the most accurately named film of all time – is Disaster Movie.
Here is the point in the review where I normally summarize the plot over a few paragraphs. However, with Disaster Movie, there is no plot. Rather, it’s a hodge-podge of pop culture references thrown onto the screen. Few of these jokes are remotely funny, and even fewer actually make you laugh, although I will admit to giggling a few times in the film.
However, most of the film is excruciating to endure. I actually watched about a dozen people walk out of the theater half-way through… and it was a free screening.
From poop jokes to Jessica Simpson, nothing is sacred. Friedberg and Seltzer continue to explain their jokes on the screen, in case the audience is too stupid to know who Dr. Phil or Hannah Montana is. Of course, this makes sense considering they use the same four actors to play most of the celebrities with impersonations so poor they wouldn’t make it on the MADtv reject list.
Sadly, Friedberg and Seltzer (whom I like to refer to as the directorial Antichrists) continue to get funding. And the funding comes in so fast that they don’t have enough material to fill their short 90-minute running time. We are left with gags that go on waaaaaaaaay too long, like the six-minute High School Musical dance number with only slightly naughty lyrics, or a saber-toothed Amy Winehouse belching for a good 60 seconds or more.
It’s sad when a movie is so bad, it becomes the subject of late-night debates on whether it’s better or worse than Uwe Boll’s Postal.
Seriously, the only saving grace of this film is that the directors had the decency to put hot chicks in front of the camera. Carmen Electra (who is looking a bit long in the tooth, mind you) does her due diligence with a wrestling/Twister sequence with Kim Kardashian. And the fact that Kardashian in her screen debut (well, the big screen at least) has the good sense to wear a shirt with a plunging neckline so we can stare at her cleavage for a chunk of the movie is also a welcome surprise.
And rounding off the hottie list is Vanessa Minnillo, who plays the female lead. She definitely makes at least part of the movie very watchable.
THE UPSIDE: Kim Kardashian’s boobs.
THE DOWNSIDE: Everything else.
ON THE SIDE: A title like Disaster Movie is as random as the jokes herein. This could have been called Epic Movie II, Meet the Cloverfield Monster or It’s Better Than Genital Warts and been as relevant.
译文:
灾难大电影，一场大灾难
正像我们见证了2007年性虐电影的大崩盘一样，2008年我们很有可能见证恶搞电影的溃败。
一方面说来，这是一种耻辱。我喜欢好的恶搞电影。梅尔·布鲁克斯在上个世纪七八十年代指导了几部不错的恶搞片子。 ZAZ组合（大卫·祖克、吉姆·亚布拉罕和杰瑞·祖克） 拍摄了《空前绝后满天飞》和《笑破铁幕》。 凯南·伊沃里·韦恩斯最近以《惊声尖笑》开启了新潮流。
之后《惊声尖笑》的6个编剧中的江郎才尽的两位——杰森·弗瑞德伯格和亚伦·塞尔泽遭到了点打击。曾经那么聪明有趣的电影流派变成了完完全全的废物槽、垃圾桶。
现在，他们推出了最新的电影《灾难大电影》——这很可能是前所未有的命名最为准确的电影。
以下是这篇评论的重点，我通常会在短短几段文字中总结电影的大致情节。然而，对于《灾难大电影》来说，它没有情节可言。确切的说，这是一个被搬上银幕影射流行文化的大杂烩。电影里面只有零星几个笑话有一点点有趣，而真正能令你笑出来的就更屈指可数了——虽然我承认在看电影的时候我笑了几次。
然而，这部电影的绝大部分都让人难以忍受。事实上我看到大约十几个人中途离开了电影院……而且这还是在免费观看的情况下发生的。
从无聊的搞笑到杰西卡·辛普森，这部电影还真是糟粕。弗瑞德伯格和塞尔泽继续在萤幕上解释他们的笑话，就好像观众愚蠢到连菲尔博士或者汉娜·蒙塔娜是谁都搞不清楚。当然，考虑到他们用相同的4个演技很烂的演员扮演影片中的大部分名人，而又不会登上《疯狂电视秀》的拒绝名单，这一切就很好理解了。
可悲的是，弗瑞德伯格和塞尔泽（我喜欢称他们为导演界的反基督徒）依然继续在拉赞助。资金来得如此之快，快到他们没有足够的素材填充一部短短90分钟的电影。我们看到的只是冗长无聊、没完没了的插科打诨，比如在青春歌舞里6分多钟掺杂着那么点嬉皮意味歌词的舞曲，再比如长着虎牙的艾米·怀恩豪斯足足打了60多秒钟的嗝。
当一部电影糟糕到它变成了午夜争论的话题，人们纷纷讨论它会比乌维·鲍尔的《快乐的恐怖分子》精彩还是糟糕的时候，这就太悲哀啦。
事实上，这部电影唯一持有的一点温柔就是导演得体地把美女辣妹放在了镜头前。卡门·伊莱克特拉（注意^她看起来未免太老了吧）用她适当的勤奋与金·卡迪珊对垒。而且卡迪珊在她的荧屏处女作（至少是初登大屏幕）明智地穿了一件衬衫配一串醒目的项链，这样在看电影的大段时间我们可以盯着她的乳沟，这是个很不错的惊喜。
使辣妹名单达到完美的是饰演女主角的凡妮莎·米尼洛。她绝对是使这部电影值得关注的一个原因。
