We've all heard the term, "mind your manners." Tweens are at an age where they can truly grasp the importance of manners, especially as they grow older.
Good manners are essential for kids and adults alike. Everyone wants to be treated with respect, so in turn we must learn to treat others with respect, too. Good manners show others that you truly care about them and consider their feelings.
Tweens are at the prime age for teaching good manners because they are able to understand goals and grasp ideas of why good manners are so important. You may start teaching your child about good manners at a much younger age, but it is limited by the child's ability to understand what is being taught.
Listed below are some fun and interactive activities that you can use to help your tween develop good manners. Once good manners are developed and practiced daily, they start to become a way of life. In turn, your tween will carry on interactions with others in a pleasing and respectful way that will follow her throughout life.
Good Manners Books
Reading is a good way to help your tween learn good manners. Here is a list of suggestions for you to consider:
- Emily Post's The Gift of Good Manners: A Parent's Guide to Raising Respectful, Kind, Considerate Children (by Peggy Post, 2005)
- How Rude!: The Teenagers' Guide to Good Manners, Proper Behavior (by Alex J. Packer, 1997)
- 365 Manners Kids Should Know: Games, Activities, and Other Fun Ways to Help Children Learn Etiquette (by Sheryl Eberly, 2001)
Role Playing
Learning by doing is one of the best ways to teach tweens. Pretend you are the child and your tween is the parent. Give a scenario where you say or do something rude, and ask your tween to tell you how you should have said or done. Many times a child will know how she is supposed to act, but doesn't feel it is necessary to actually follow through on the correct behavior. Role playing can help your child see just how awful bad manners sound and make others feel. Reverse roles and let your child practice saying and doing things correctly. Daily practice is a great idea!
Manners Chart
This activity involves your involvement, as well as your tween's participation. Have your child list characteristics that she feels are good manners, and you do the same. Compare your lists and discuss why or why not you agree with her items on her list. Be courteous and let her be open about your list, as well. Once you have both agreed upon good characteristics, make a formal chart that she can hang in her room. You can make a fancy chart on MS Publisher or other computer program, or let her design her own chart free-hand.
译文:
通过有趣的活动培养孩子的性格
我们都听说过这句话：“注意礼貌。”上小学的年纪能够真正懂得礼貌的重要性，尤其是当他们长大的时候。
良好的礼貌对孩子和大人同样重要。每个人都想被有尊敬，所以我们也需要向其他人表示尊敬。良好的礼貌将向其他人展示你确实关心他们，并考虑他们的感受。
小学阶段（8到13岁）是受教良好礼貌的最重要年龄，因为他们能够领会目标，并懂得为什么良好礼貌是如此的重要。你可能在你的孩子更小的时候就开始对他们进行礼貌教育了，但那时候孩子领悟你教育的内容的能力还十分有限。
以下列出的是一些有趣的互动活动，你可以用其帮助你的小孩发展他们的礼貌个性。一旦良好的礼貌性格被开发，并每日实践，这就成为他们生活的一种方式。同时，你的孩子也会与其他人以愉快且有礼貌的方式进行互动，这会让她终生受益。
“有礼貌”的书
阅读是帮助你的孩子学习良好礼貌的一种好方法。这里向您推荐几本供您参考：
艾米莉· 珀斯特《良好礼貌的礼物：父母的育儿指南，助您培养尊重人、亲切、体贴的孩子》（佩吉·珀斯特，2005年）
《多么粗鲁！孩子们良好礼貌、适当行为的指南》（亚历克斯·J.帕克，1997年）
《孩子们要知道的365种礼貌：游戏、活动以及其他有趣的方式以帮助孩子学习礼节》（舍莉·埃波里，2001年）
角色扮演
通过做来学习是教授上小学的孩子的最好办法。你假装是孩子，而孩子装成父母。设定一个情节，由你说或做出一些粗鲁的事情，并让你的孩子告诉你这时候该说什么，该做什么。很多时候一个孩子会知道她应该怎么做，但却觉得不必要按照正确的行为来照做。角色扮演能够帮助你的孩子看到恶劣的不良礼貌什么样子并让其他人如何感想。将角色调转，并让你的孩子亲自实践来说并做正确的事情。每天都实践是一个好主意！
礼貌图表
这个活动需要你和孩子的共同参与。让你的孩子列出她觉得哪些是良好的礼貌，你也来做一遍。将你们列出的内容进行比较并讨论为什么你会赞同她列出的一部分内容，以及为什么反对另外一些。要有礼貌，也让孩子充分了解你的列表。一旦你们俩对这些良好礼貌达成一致，则制成一张正式的图表让她挂在她的房间里。你可以用MS Publisher或其他电脑程序做一个漂亮的图表，或让她自己设计手绘图表。
艾丽提供了一些有趣的游戏以帮助教授良好礼貌。
当你的小孩在未被告知的情况下主动表现出良好的礼貌时，请记得表扬她。这能够起到必要的鼓励作用，让孩子继续实践并做正确的事情。当需要表现出良好的礼貌时，你要经常提醒她，最后你会看到她会自动做这些事情，这就是对你最好的嘉奖。