Note: This is a guest post by Vlad Dolezal of An Amazing Mind.
While explaining stress management to an audience, the lecturer raised a glass of water and asked ‘How heavy is this glass of water?’ Answers called out ranged from 20g to 500g.
The lecturer replied, “The absolute weight doesn’t matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it. If I hold it for a minute, that’s not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my right arm. If I hold it for a day, you’ll have to call an ambulance. In each case, it’s the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.”
He continued, “And that’s the way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won’t be able to carry on.”
“As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again. When we’re refreshed, we can carry on with the burden.”
“So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of work down. Don’t carry it home. You can pick it up tomorrow. Whatever burdens you’re carrying now, let them down for a moment if you can.”
Here are 5 simple ways to increase your peace of mind:
1. Do your most daunting task first thing in the morning
It’s tempting to start your day with easy tasks. Don’t. Pushing a daunting task back is like holding a glass of water in an outstretched arm. At first nothing happens, but if you do it for hours or even days, you will soon feel the stress. Do the most annoying task first thing in the morning, and enjoy increased productivity and peace of mind for the rest of the day.
2. Let go of things you don’t control
You make plans to go outside with friends. But at the last minute, it starts raining. What’s your reaction?
Some people upset and angry, and find the nearest person and start complaining to them. “It’s not FAIR that it’s raining. This _always_ happens to me!…”
That’s not going to accomplish anything - the rain won’t stop just because you throw a tantrum. *The rain doesn’t care.* So make the best of the situation. What I do in such situation is go for a quick walk in the park (because rain has its own awesomeness), or just lie in bed reading a good Terry Pratchett book, listening to the rain beating on my window.
Make the most of what you do control, and don’t worry about what you don’t.
3. Don’t worry about what others are thinking
I used to be very self-conscious about my dancing. I would rarely go out with my friends, and even if I did, I wouldn’t dance, instead just standing awkwardly by the side, because I was worried of what others would think.
Then, one day in high school, I decided that enough was enough. So the next time I went out with my friends, I just went to the dance floor, and danced like nobody was watching. And the funny thing was - nobody cared. In fact, people only liked me MORE, because I was having fun.
Don’t worry about what others are thinking of you - most likely they’re too busy wondering what others are thinking of them.
4. List 3 things you love about your situation right now
I first shared this technique with the Positivity Blog readers in my post The Plague of Happiness Ever After (it’s got a dragon and everything in it, read it!)
Just list 3 simple things about any part of your life that you love. Like “3 simple things I love about the room I’m in right now”, or “3 simple things I love about this week”, or anything else.
This is a great technique if you’re ever bored while stuck in traffic, or waiting in the grocery store checkout lane. You can immediately transform boredom into happiness and peace of mind!
5. Walk to a window, look outside, and take a single deep breath
I got this technique from the Zen master Mary Jaksch. Just walk to a window, look outside, and then take a single deep breath, focusing only on that breath and nothing else in the whole world. This technique sounds extremely simple, but you won’t believe how much it can instantaneously increase your peace of mind.
And because this is the last tip, you can try it immediately when you finish reading this blog post. Just walk to a window, look outside, and take a single deep breath, focusing on the air going in and out of your lungs, and nothing else.
Check out Vlad’s blog to get even more happiness in the now! It’s got psychology, personal growth, and a crapton of attitude!
Image by kwerfeldein (license).
If you like this article, please share it on Twitter and Stumbleupon. Thank you very much! =)
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Copyright 2009 Henrik Edberg.
译文:
五種使你內心更加平靜的簡單方法
注： 本圖片來自Vlad Dolezal的文章An Amazing Mind
講師向觀眾解釋壓力管理。他舉起一杯水，問道：“這杯水有多重？”有人說是20克，也有人說是500克。
講師答道：“這杯水的實際重量無關緊要。重要的是你端著這杯水的時間有多長。如果我只拿一分鐘，那不成問題。如果我拿一個小時，我的右手會有點酸痛。如果我拿一天，你們就該叫救護車了。這三種情況下，這杯水的重量都是一樣的，但是我拿著它的時間越長，它就變得越重。”
他繼續道：“壓力管理亦是如此。如果我們一直背負著壓力，隨著負擔的不斷加重，我們遲早會不堪重負。”
“就和拿著這杯水一樣，你必須暫時把壓力卸下，休息一會，然後再拿起來。振作精神之後，我們才能擔起它。”
“所以，今晚回家之前，先把工作的負擔放下。不要把它帶回家。你可以明天再把它扛起來。無論你現在背負著什麼樣的壓力，如果可以的話，把它們先放一放。”
以下是五種簡單的使你內心更加平靜的方法：
1. 每天一早起來就做最令你畏懼的工作
在輕鬆自如的工作中開始新的一天固然很誘人。（但是）不要這樣。往後推遲可怕的工作就像是把一杯水放在一隻伸展的手臂上。起初你覺得沒什麼，但是如果持續這樣幾個小時或者幾天，你不久就會感覺到有壓力。每天一大清早就把最煩人的工作做完，然後剩下的一整天都可以享受高效和內心的平靜了。
2. 拋開那些你無法控制的事
你打算和朋友外出。但是臨出門的時候，天下起了雨。你會有什麼反應？
有些人會生氣，會感到沮喪，於是開始向他們身邊最近的人抱怨。“下雨了，真糟糕。這種事情總是發生在我身上……”
抱怨無濟於事——老天不會因為你生氣了就不下雨了。它才不在乎呢。*所以，好好利用這個時機吧。每當這個時候我就會去公園裏疾走（因為下雨也有它的好處）或者躺在床上讀一讀特裏·普拉切特的好書，聽聽雨打在窗臺上的聲音。
最大限度地利用你所能控制的，不要擔心你所不能控制的。
3. 別在意別人的看法
我過去常常為自己的舞技感到難為情。我很少和朋友出去，即使有時候出去，我也從不跳舞。相反，我只是笨拙地站在一旁，因為我在意別人對我的看法。
後來，高中時候的某一天，我決定不再繼續（畏縮下去）。因此，下一次當我和朋友出去的時候，我徑直走到舞池裏，旁若無人地跳起舞來。有趣的是，根本沒人在意。事實上，他們會更喜歡我，因為我玩得很開心。
不要擔心別人會怎麼看你——他們很可能都在忙於瞭解別人是怎麼看他們的呢。
4. 列出3件你在目前的處境下所喜愛的事情
我第一次與讀者們共同分享這一技巧，是在Positivity博客上，當時我發表了文章《緊隨幸福之後的煎熬》。（文章裏有一個悍婦，還有其他很多東西。去讀讀吧）。
如果路上堵車時無聊，或是在雜貨店付款時等著結賬，你就可以列出你生活中所喜愛的任何三件簡單的事情。比如“讓我喜歡的現在所住房間的3件事情”，或者“這個星期讓我熱衷的3件事”。這樣會使你立即把無聊變成快樂，內心也會得到平靜。
5. 走到窗邊，向外看，做做深呼吸
我從瑪麗•傑克斯禪師那裏學到這個技巧。走到窗邊，向外看，然後深呼吸，把注意力集中到這一口氣上就行了，不要理會周圍的世界。這個技巧聽起來極其簡單，但是你可能不會相信它立刻會使你的內心多麼平靜。
因為這是最後一個建議了，讀完這篇博文之後，你可以立刻試一試。徑直走到窗邊，向外看，然後深吸一口氣，全神貫注於肺裏吸進和呼出的空氣，其他的什麼也不要想。
現在從弗拉德博客裏尋找更多的快樂吧！博客內容涉及心理學、個人成長和生活態度。
照片由 kwerfeldein提供（
許可）
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