时光荏苒，岁月如歌。转眼已经四十奔三了。常言道四十不惑，最近自己也常常在闲暇之时反问自己：我真的不惑了吗？今天工余竟然兴致倍增，思绪奔涌。记下若干心得与大家共勉。
四十以后才明白：好朋友是应该相互欣赏的，而不是相互利用的。好朋友只能在同一阶层中产生，而穷人和富人，百姓和达官，草根和明星，白丁和学者则永远不可能成为真正意义上的朋友。因为不在同一阶层，便永远不会有对方对本阶层的深刻体会与感悟。
四十以后才明白：饭应一口一口吃，事要一点一点做。没有一蹴而就的事情，所以就不应该疲于奔命。中年，应该活得从容。
四十以后才明白：光从容还是不够的，适当的时候还是要秀一下自己，让平淡的日子亮起来。
四十以后才明白：年龄之于人生只不过是一个符号而已。所谓“少小有才国家用，老大空长做什么？”是焉。
四十以后才明白：任何事物都具有两重性，有时候甚至没有对错。你以为错的，在别人看来或许是对的。而你竭尽全力为之奋斗的，却很有可能正是别人摆脱和抛弃的。
四十以后才明白：生活质量的优劣，完全取决于自己的心态。珍馐美味、杯晃交错间如果掩映的是而虞我诈。则远不如“三五知己坐，淡茶话家常。”来的可心。如果高官厚禄却穷于心智，惶于仕途。就远不如“采菊东篱下，悠然见南山。”活得逍遥。
四十以后才明白：对待我们心仪的异性知己，多一分关爱，少一分贪婪。会使自己的情感天空少一丝阴霾，多一缕阳光。
四十以后才明白：亲情的疏离是切肤的伤痛。淡一些、谅一些、忍一些，会使我们的心宽一些、和一些、暖一些。
四十以后才明白：对待父母再不可做薄养厚葬的傻事了，他们那一辈人受的磨砺太多了，善待他们就是善待我们的良心。说起善待，父母会很疼钱，但动一动脑子事情就会办的圆满。比如：可以去酒店定一碗极品燕窝汤，端回来告诉他们这是小摊上两块钱一碗的南方的胡辣汤，然后看着他们幸福的享用。其实大多的时候他们根本就不需要你的荣华，每周问他们一个年轻时的故事，然后耐心的听他们讲完，他们就很知足了。
四十以后才明白：我们的伴侣看似平淡无奇，有些时候甚至难以忍受。其实岁月的年轮早已将彼此裹融到一起了。即使是恶习俗性，也已成为自己生命的一部分了。如果有一天你真的要撕毁这不堪的婚姻，就会发现每撕一片，都会连着自己的皮肉和筋骨。
四十以后才明白：我们对孩子的溺爱就像高脂高糖一样的危害着他们的健康。我们害怕他们走弯路，我们担心他们吃苦头，我们忧虑他们经风雨。我们全家人为他们搭起了大棚，然后呆呆的望着他们柔弱的发育着。
四十以后才明白：职位只不过是一个杯子，而你的修养和品性才是你杯中的尤物。夜光杯中未必盛的就是葡萄美酒，也可能是一杯浊水。粗瓷盏里未见得就是白开水，很可能闷的是一盏极品龙井。个中的质量全在自己后天的造化。
译文:
Not understand that till forty years later（transshipment）
Time flies day by day. Three passes forty in a flash. As the saying goes: Life begins at forty. Recently, I often ask myself in my spare time: Am I really at the age of No-doubt? After today’s work, I was full of zest, and myriad of thoughts well up in my mind. Take down some thoughts and share them with you.
Not understand that till forty years later: Good friends should be mutual appreciation instead of mutual appropriations. Good friends can only be produced in the same class, and the poor and the rich, the common people and the high officials, the grassroots and the pop stars, the illiteracies and the scholars will never become true friends. Because they are not in the same class, they never have the peers’ profound experience and insights to the class.
Not understand that till forty years later: Rice should be mouthful eaten, and things should be done little by little. No things can be made at one stroke, so we should not run in circles. Instead, we should live an easy life at middle-aged.
Not understand that till forty years later: Only calm is not enough, we should show ourselves at an appropriate time to light the watery days.
Not understand that till forty years later: Age for life is no more than a symbol. The saying “The talented make contributes to country in their young, but what will they do when they are old?” is true.
Not understand that till forty years later: Everything has a dual nature, and even sometimes there isn’t something quite right about it. What you consider to be wrong may appear to be right to others. Something you make every effort to strive for is very likely the one that others get rid of or abandon.
Not understand that till forty years later: The quality of life is totally up to your mental attitude. The amenity from “Small clusters of friends sit together, talking about the daily life of a family over cups of weak tea.” is better than the mutual deception under delicious delicacy and staggered cups. The life like“While picking asters 'neath the Eastern fence，my gaze upon the Southern mountain rests”is more free and unfettered than the one that someone is in a high position with good salary while he is poor in mind and has great anxiety about his official career.
Not understand that till forty years later: Treat our favorite friend of the opposite sex, we should be more love, less greedy. By doing so, there will be less trace of haze and more crack of sunlight in our feelings.
Not understand that till forty years later: Alienation of affection is a pain just like our skins being cut. Some short, some understanding, some tolerance will make our hearts be wider, moreharmonious and warmer.
Not understand that till forty years later: we should never do such foolish things like thin foster and lavish funeral to treat parents. Their generation have been suffered a lot, so care them is caring our conscience. When referring to the kindness, parents will be much pain about money, but things would really work out fine by using our head. For example: You can go to the pub to order the best Bird's Nest Soup, and come back to tell them that this is southern hot pepper porridge you buy it with 2 Yuan at a stand, then watch them enjoying the soup happily. As a matter of fact, most of the time, they do not need your splendor at all. Instead, they will be satisfied with that if you ask them one story about their young a week and listen to them patiently till the end.
Not understand that till forty years later: Our partner appears to be plain, sometimes even unbearable. In fact, we have been one year by year. Even the bad practices have been a part of our life.If one day you really want to tear up the unbearable marriage, you will find that eachpiece you tear up is linked to your flesh and bones.
Not understand that till forty years later: We spoil the kids just like the high-fat and the high-sugar are harmful to their health. We are afraid that they run in circles, worried that they suffer hardships and experience difficulty. The whole family put up the greenhouse for them, and then we watch them growing feebly silently.
Not understand that till forty years later: Occupation is nothing but a cup, while your accomplishment and character is the stunner in the cups. Maybe foul water rather than Just Grapes is in the Night-light Glass. It is not always the boiled water in the stoneware cup. Maybe the Longjing tea is in it. The whole of the quality depends on their own acquired good fortune.