原文: Bizarre Times and Players in Manhattan Real Estate

In the immortal words of Poltergeist's Carol Ann..."WHAT'S HAPPENING!?!!!"  The market she is a changin' as tighter lending standards, more savvy consumers, and overly cautious co-op boards sculpt the new face of Manhattan residential real estate.  Here are examples some bizarre behaviors and the players that exhibit them in today's marketplace:

• Managing agent emails us this morning stating that the building in which we are representing purchasers will only accept 30 year fixed rate mortgages...NO exceptions.
• First time buyer calls to ask if another co-op will accept 90% financing...good luck even finding a bank much less a co-op that will these days.
• A buyer signs a contract after a 3 week negotiation and informs his attorney of his arrest record.  The attorney wants to make the record part of the contract so that WHEN the board turns her client down, he would not be considered in default...moving on to the next bidder.
• Bank calls client and informs them that they will no longer be lending them the money they promised in the commitment letter because they can't repackage the loan and sell it.
• Buyer contacts my seller directly in an attempt to strike "a better deal by eliminating the brokers." Buyer also bids and asks to put down $5000 contract deposit on a $2M property (standard is 10%).  Seller explains that commission must be paid regardless so she should reach out to me.  She then reaches out to her own agent whom she also circumvented.
• Above buyer's attorney is a litigator and spends most days in court unable to respond to seller's attorney.
• Managing agent takes 5 weeks to process a Board application.  If you think this is typical, then you need to hire Hoffman Management and work with Gordan Noah who can turn a package around in 24-48 hours.  He's a stud!
• Many buyers asking for mortgage contingencies and sellers remain reluctant to accept this.
• 6 contracts fall through on one property for a variety of bizarre reasons none of which have anything to do with the property or building itself.
• Simultaneously, bidding wars take place and multiple properties go to contract significantly over the asking prices.
• Agent uses horrendous photos of property from 7 years ago to market a very high end property.  Despite my client's and my better judgement, we view the space anyway only to find it is a STEAL with glorious views (not marketed as such) and has been completely renovated. 

So it is indeed a bizarre environment in Manhattan residential real estate right now.  Deal flow continues but not without sometimes very odd challenges along the way.  Navigating all of this provides a wild ride!  My head hurts!

译文: 曼哈顿房地产业的奇异时代

• 经理人今天早上发邮件声明，我们正在介绍给顾客的这幢楼只接受30年固定利率抵押贷款……绝无例外。
• 第一次有顾客打电话询问别的合作公寓是否会接受90%的融资率……这个时候不要说合作公寓，能找家接受这个的银行就算你好运气了。
• 一个买主在3周的谈判后签了合同，并将他的拘留记录告知了他的法律顾问。这位顾问便想将此记录加入合同中，以便在委员会拒绝她的客户时，他不会被当作违约……叫下一个出价者。
• 银行通知客户，不能再如委托书中承诺的那样借钱给他们，因为银行无法打包出售贷款。
• 买主直接联系我的销售商，试图“绕过代理做笔更划算的买卖”，而且还想免去为2百万美元房产所付的$5000合同定金（一般标准是10%）。销售商解释说佣金是无论如何要付的，所以她得再联系我，随后她跑去联系了同样被绕过的她的代理商。
• 上述买主的法律顾问是位诉讼律师，大部分时候都在出庭，根本没时间回复销售商的法律顾问。
• 经理人要花5周时间处理一起委员会申请。如果你觉得这很正常，那你就得聘请Hoffman管理公司，与能在24-48小时内周转一个包的Gordan Noah一起工作，他可是顶梁柱！
• 许多顾客要求获得贷款条件，而销售商依然不愿意接受。
• 一处房产的六个合同都因为各种各样奇怪的原因告吹，其中没有一个原因是和房产本身有关的。
• 与此同时，竞价大战也在展开，许多房产以远高于要价的价格成交。
• 代理商用7年前拍的可怕照片来推销一处高端房产。尽管我和我的客户已据此下了判断，我们还是去实地看了看，这才发现捡到了大便宜——那里景色壮丽（超过推销介绍），而且已经彻底翻新了。