So I thought that I might write a quick review of every self-help book ever written all right here in this one little post. Simple enough. I love the easy jobs. Surely it couldn't be that hard, could it? I figured that maybe I could take the important lessons from every self-help book I've read and every life experience I've endured, condense all that into fifty key points and save everybody a whole bunch of reading time. Sure, global book sales in the self-help field might take a down-turn for a decade or so, but I'm willing to take that chance and put in a solid sixty minutes (or so) work for the good of humanity; my gift to mankind.
Selfless I know. I thought that perhaps I could follow Stephen Covey's lead (the Seven Habits) and come up with my own list of say... Fifty Habits (in truth, some of them are more qualities, than habits). It couldn't be too difficult to distill all those millions of words, tens of thousands of books and that vast well of information, inspiration, wisdom and insight which has been collated over the centuries into one teensy-weensy post by the ex-fat kid right here on medotcom. Who else could be better qualified?
Don't answer that. Habits of successful people.... 1. They look for and find opportunities where others see nothing.
2. They find a lesson while others only see a problem.
3. They are solution focused.
4. They consciously and methodically create their own success, while others hope success will
find them.
5. They are fearful like everyone else, but they are not controlled or limited by fear.
6. They ask the right questions - the ones which put them in a productive, creative, positive mindset and emotional state.
7. They rarely complain (waste of energy). All complaining does is put the
complainer in a negative and unproductive state.
8. They don't blame (what's the point?). They take complete responsibility for their actions and outcomes (or lack thereof).
9. While they are not necessarily more talented than the majority, they always find a way to maximise their potential. They get more out of themselves. They use what they have more effectively.
10. They are busy, productive and proactive. While most are laying on the couch, planning, over-thinking, sitting on their hands and generally going around in circles, they are out there getting the job done.
11. They align themselves with like-minded people. They understand the importance of being part of a team. They create win-win relationships.
12. They are ambitious; they want
amazing - and why shouldn't they? They consciously choose to live their best life rather than spending it on auto-pilot.
13. They have clarity and certainty about what they want (and don't want) for their life. They actually visualise and plan their best reality while others are merely spectators of life.
14. They innovate rather than imitate.
15. They don't procrastinate and they don't spend their life waiting for the 'right time'.
16. They are life-long learners. They constantly work at educating themselves, either formally (academically), informally (watching, listening, asking, reading, student of life) or experientially (doing, trying)... or all three.
17. They are glass half full people - while still being practical and down-to-earth. They have an ability to
find the good.
18. They consistently do what they need to do, irrespective of how they are
feeling on a given day. They don't spend their life stopping and starting.
19. They take calculated risks - financial, emotional, professional, psychological.
20. They deal with problems and challenges quickly and effectively, they don't put their head in the sand. They face their challenges and use them to improve themselves.
21. They don't believe in, or wait for fate, destiny, chance or luck to determine or shape their future. They believe in, and are committed to actively and consciously creating their own best life.
22. While many people are reactive, they are proactive. They take action before they
have to.
23. They are more effective than most at managing their emotions. They feel like we all do but they are not slaves to their emotions.
24. They are good communicators and they consciously work at it.
25. They have a plan for their life and they work methodically at turning that plan into a reality. Their life is not a clumsy series of unplanned events and outcomes.
26. Their desire to be exceptional means that they typically do things that most won't. They become exceptional by choice. We're all faced with live-shaping decisions almost daily. Successful people make the decisions that most won't and don't.
27. While many people are pleasure junkies and avoid pain and discomfort at all costs, successful people understand the value and benefits of working through the tough stuff that most would avoid.
28. They have identified their core values (what is important to them) and they do their best to live a life which is reflective of those values.
29. They have balance. While they
may be financially successful, they know that the terms
money and
success are not interchangeable. They understand that people who are successful on a financial level only, are not successful at all. Unfortunately we live in a society which teaches that money equals success. Like many other things, money is a tool. It's certainly not a bad thing but ultimately, it's just another resource. Unfortunately, too many people worship it.
30. They understand the importance of discipline and self-control. They are strong. They are happy to take the road less travelled.
31. They are secure. They do not derive their sense of worth of self from what they own, who they know, where they live or what they look like.
32. They are generous and kind. They take pleasure in helping others achieve.
33. They are humble and they are happy to admit mistakes and to apologise. They are confident in their ability, but not arrogant. They are happy to learn from others. They are happy to make others look good rather than seek their own personal glory.
34. They are adaptable and embrace change, while the majority are creatures of comfort and habit. They are comfortable with, and embrace, the new and the unfamiliar.
35. They keep themselves in shape physically, not to be mistaken with training for the Olympics or being obsessed with their body. They understand the importance of being physically well. They are not all about looks, they are more concerned with function and health. Their body is not
who they are, it's where they live.
36. They have a big engine. They work hard and are not lazy.
37. They are resilient. When most would throw in the towel, they're just warming up.
38. They are open to, and more likely to act upon, feedback.
39. They don't hang out with toxic people.
40. They don't invest time or emotional energy into things
which they have no control of.
41. They are happy to swim against the tide, to do what most won't. They are not people pleasers and they don't need constant approval.
42. They are more comfortable with their own company than most.
43. They set higher standards for themselves (a choice we can all make), which in turn produces greater commitment, more momentum, a better work ethic and of course, better results.
44. They don't rationalise failure. While many are talking about their age, their sore back, their lack of time, their poor genetics, their 'bad luck', their nasty boss and their lack of opportunities (all good reasons to fail), they are finding a way to succeed despite all their challenges.
45. They have an
off switch. They know how to relax, enjoy what they have in their life and to have fun.
46. Their career is not their identity, it's their job. It's not who they are, it's what they do.
47. They are more interested in
effective than they are in
easy. While the majority look for the quickest, easiest way (the shortcut), they look for the course of action which will produce the best results over the long term.
48. They finish what they start. While so many spend their life starting things that they never finish, successful people get the job done - even when the excitement and the novelty have worn off. Even when it ain't
fun.
49. They are multi-dimensional, amazing, wonderful complex creatures (as we all are). They realise that not only are they physical and psychological beings, but emotional and spiritual creatures as well. They consciously work at being
healthy and productive on all levels.
50. They practice what they preach. They don't talk about the theory, they live the reality.
So there you have it, your days of reading self-help books are done!
Okay, maybe not. I may have missed a few. Feel free to add a habit or two of your own to the list.
译文:
五十个成功的习惯
我认为我能在这个小小的版面上写出每一本自助书的快速回顾。这足够的简单。我喜欢这样的容易工作。这项工作的确不是那么困难，不是吗？我体会到我或许可以从我读的每一本自助书和我所经受的人生经历中得到重要的启示。现在我把这些启示浓缩为五十点，以节省每位的大量阅读时间。诚然，最近十年左右自助书领域的全球销量呈下降趋势，但是我宁愿冒这个风险，为了人类利益奉献处我整整六十分钟（左右）的劳动，以此作为我给人们的礼物。
坦诚相告
我想或许我可以跟随史蒂芬·柯维先生的引导（高效能人士的七个习惯），然后提出我的一系列说法…五十个习惯（事实上，有些是特质，而不是习惯）。将整理了几个世纪的千百万的字、数以万计的书和有关信息、灵感、智慧和洞察力的巨大源泉纳入瘦小男孩的小小网页上，实在是太难了。然而又还有谁更适合担此重任呢？
不再多说
成功人士的习惯：
1．他们能够在别人视若无睹的地方发现机会。
2．别人只看到问题时，他们设法找出教训。
3．他们是专注于解决方案的人。
4．他们有意识地、系统地创造自己成功的事业，而别人期待成功垂青于自己。
5．他们和其他人一样有恐惧感，但是他们不会被恐惧所控制或者限制。
6．他们提出的问题，正好能够使他们拥有多成果的、创造性的、积极的心境或心态。
7．他们很少发牢骚（浪费精力）。所有的牢骚只会将发牢骚者带入负面的、低效率的境地之中。
8．他们不责备别人（这是关键点）。他们对自己的行动和结果（或者是其欠缺）完全负责。
9．虽然他们不一定比大多数人更聪明，但是他们总是寻找途径最大化他们的潜能。他们能够从外界得到更多东西，他们能够更为有效地利用自己的资源。
10．他们匆忙、高效、富有远见。当大多数人躺在椅子上考虑计划、全面思考，把重担放在下属身上自己通常在圈子里转悠时，他们力主把工作完成。
11．他们同志趣相投的人们达成合作。他们理解作为团队的一部分的重要性，因此他们创造双赢的人际关系。
12．他们有雄心壮志，他们想要一鸣惊人、无所不能！他们有意识地选择属于自己的最佳生活方式，而不想过程式化的生活。
13．他们对生活中什么需要和什么不需要有清晰的认识和确凿的把握。他们真正把握和规划自己的真实生活，而别人只是生活的旁观者。
14．他们创新而不是模仿
15．他们从不耽搁，从不将生命花费在等待中。
16．他们是终身学习者。他们不断致力于通过正式方式（学术性地）、非正式方式（在生活中观察、聆听、询问、阅读）、经验性方式（工作和努力）或者三种方式结合来培养自己。
17．在务实和脚踏实地的同时，他们还是“一瓶子不满半瓶子摇晃”的人。他们拥有发现优势的能力。
18．他们持之以恒地致力于需要做的事情，而不会去管自己特定时刻的心情。他们不喜欢从头再来。
19．他们会冒有一定把握的风险-经济上的、感情上的、职业上的和心理上的风险。
20．他们能够迅速有效地应对问题和挑战，他们从不回避。他们直面挑战并利用挑战来提高自己。
21．他们不相信或者等待命运、宿命、机会或者幸运来决定或者规划自己的未来。他们相信并致力于积极地有意识地创造自己的，美好生活。
22．大多数人是反映能动型的，而他们是积极能动型的，他们总是在必须做之前就采取行动。
23．在控制感情上他们比大多数人更有效。他们和我们想得一样，但是他们不会成为感情的奴隶。
24．他们是优秀的沟通者，并且有意识地致力于有效沟通。
25．他们有自己的生活计划，并且通过系统的工作将计划变为现实。他们的生活不是一大堆无计划的事件和结果。
26．他们需要处理事情的特殊手段，而我们大多数人不这样处理事情。他们出于这种选择而变得特殊。我们每个人几乎每天都面临着转变生活的决定。成功人士果断作决定，而大多数人不想或者不作决定。
27．当大多数人沉迷于享乐、不惜一切代价躲避痛苦和不适时，成功人士知道在艰苦条件下工作的价值和益处，而大多数人都躲避艰苦的工作。
28．他们确定了自己的核心价值（什么对他们重要）并竭尽全力使自己的生活体现自己的核心价值。
29．他们懂得权衡。虽然他们可能在经济上取得了成功，但是他们知道金钱和成功是不能互换的。他们懂得在经济水平上的成功不是真正的成功。遗憾的是，我们生活的社会教育我们金钱等同于成功。同其它事物一样，金钱是工具。它的确不是坏东西，但它最终是另一种资源。可惜的是太多的人对它抱以崇拜。
30．他们懂得纪律和自我控制的重要性。他们是强者，他们乐于开辟新的道路。
31．他们是有把握的。他们的自我价值感不是源于他们拥有的、他们知道的、他们居住的和他们象什么。
32．他们大方友好。他们乐于帮助别人取得成功。
33．他们谦虚、乐于承认错误并道歉。他们相信自己的能力，但不傲慢。他们乐于向别人学习，乐于是别人看上去更好，而不是争取自己的荣耀。
34．他们能够适应和接受变化。当大多数人墨守成规安于现状时，他们能够欣然接受新鲜事物和不熟悉的事物。
35．他们注重保持身体健康，但不会犯锻炼自己参加奥运会的错误，也不会被身体锻炼所困扰。
36．他们精力充沛。努力工作而不懒惰。
37．他们能够很快恢复精力。大多数人承认被击败时，他们精力旺盛。
38．他们重视利用反馈。
39．他们不同瘾君子交往。
40．他们不把时间和精力投入到没有把握的事情上。
41．他们乐于逆潮流而动，为众人所不为。他们不是取悦众人者，也不需要持续的肯定。
42．与他人相比，他们对自己的公司更满意。
43．他们对自己设定更高的标准（我们每个人都可以做出的选择），相应的会有更大的奉献精神、进取精神和良好的职业道德，同时当然会取得更好的成果。
44．他们不给失败找理由。当多数人说自己年纪大、身体不行、缺乏时间、身世不好、运气不好、老板差劲、缺少机会（一大堆失败的好借口），尽管充满挑战，他们总会想方设法取得成功。
45．他们会休息。他们懂得如何放松自己、如何享受自己的生活、并拥有乐趣。
46．他们的职业不是他们的身份，那是他们的工作。那不是真正的他们，那是他们所做的。
47．他们更喜欢有效性而不是简捷性。当大多数人寻找最快捷最容易的方法（捷径）时，他们会找出长期内取得最佳成果的行动方案。
48．他们善始善终。当别人会半途而废时，成功人士即使筋疲力尽也会坚持到底直至成功。
49．他们是全面性、爆发性和综合性于一体。他们明确自己不仅是生理和心理的实体，而且是情感和精神的实体。他们有意识地致力于全面的健康和有成效。
50．他们言出必行。他们务实而不空谈。
好了，或许有不对的地方。我还忘记了几个。你可以随时加上几个自己的习惯。