This article strips away the mythical cool image of criminals presented to us in films. These portray criminals as ultra intelligent, high IQ geniuses; this is not always the case. These stories are all true, from the plain stupid to the plain disturbing (no.5), and were captured on CCTV.
-
Locked Door
A man in the UK attempts to rob a building society in 2001. However the cashier pressed the emergency button to put up security screens. Seeing that his robbery has gone awry he tried to make a swift exit and headed for the doors. However he just couldn't seem to get them open. In his attempts he looses his cap revealing his face. The crook gave up and paced the building society until amazingly the next customer walks in! Sometimes it pays to pay attention to push/pull signs on doors! -
Farming
A young man who broke into a London newsagent after hours can't think of anything to steal apart from three top shelf adult magazines. However when attempting to break back out he spills over a magazine stand and unwittingly switches his magazines for Farmer's weekly! -
Disguises Gone Wrong
In 2003 two crooks in York attempted to rob a newsagent wearing homemade balaclavas, unfortunately they have forgotten to cut the eyeholes. Only the robber in Florida, who tried to use a see-thru bin liner for to hide his identity, beats this failing in disguise. -
Tele-Shopping
Surely the only thing more stupid than committing a crime on CCTV is committing a crime on live TV. That is just what happened on the Paris equivalent to the Home Shopping channel. Whilst the presenter was introducing the viewing public to some expensive jewellery two men ran through the studio and grabbed it from under the cameras lens. They only made it to the elevator. -
The Wrong Bus
In 2003 in the UK a terrible bus hijacking took place. A man sporting a Walther handgun held up the number 320 from Bigan Hill. The hijacker pointed the gun at the driver and demanded that he be taken to Bromley. This somewhat puzzled the driver because Bromely was in fact one of the usual calling points on the 320's route. However he didn't feel it was necessary to point this out to the gun man and drove straight to the Bromely police station. The hijacker was sentenced to 3 years.
译文:
自投罗网：5件史上最愚蠢的犯罪记录
这篇文章将彻底打破电影中那种帅气又神秘的罪犯形象。电影中的罪犯们是一群身怀绝技，聪明绝顶的天才，但现实中可不是这样。下面的5个犯罪行为都是用闭路电视拍下的真实事件。它们中有的蠢到叫人无语，也有的傻到令人发笑。
2001年，一名英国男子企图抢劫一家从事借贷业务的金融机构。但是出纳员急中生智地按下紧急按钮，升起了安全防护墙。发现自己的抢劫行动失败之后，他试图快速撤离现场，于是急忙冲向大门，在这千钧一发之际，门却怎么也推不开了。在试图开门的慌乱之中，这名男子弄掉了头上的帽子，露出了自己的脸。于是他终于放弃了逃跑，当他在金融机构里踱着步子来回打转的时候，突然，一件神奇的事情发生了，一名顾客推开门走了进来！（有时候我们真该关注一下门上的“请推/拉门”的告示！说不定会有意外的收获！）
一个年轻人闯进了伦敦的一家报社，在里面转悠了几个小时之后，他实在想不出有什么可偷的，于是拿走了摆在最外面的三堆供成人阅读的报纸。当他试图从后门逃走的时候却发现自己溜进了一家书报亭，无意之中为农业周报当了一回送报人。
失败的伪装
2003年，约克的两个流氓自制了遮面的头罩，准备抢劫一家报社，不幸的是，他们忘了在眼睛的位置上挖出两个洞来。这里还有个更绝的，弗罗里达州的一名强盗曾把一个透光的垃圾袋罩在头上，指望以此来隐藏自己的面容，殊不知，既然他能透过塑料袋看到外面，别人也能透过塑料袋看到他的脸。
显然，能够比在闭路电视上犯下罪行更为白痴的，就属在电视直播栏目上犯罪了。而这恰恰就是巴黎的两名强盗在“家庭消费”频道上干下的蠢事。当时主持人正在向观众介绍几款昂贵的首饰，这两名男子就径直穿过直播间，从摄像机的镜头下一把抓走了珠宝。最终，他们俩才走到电梯就被人拿下了。
2003年在英国发生了一起恐怖分子劫持公共汽车的事件。一名持有瓦尔特手枪的男子劫下了一辆从Bigan Hill驶出的公交320。这名劫车男子用枪指着公交司机，要求他把车开往布罗姆利（Bromley）。这么一来，那位司机反而被弄糊涂了，因为布罗姆利是公交320沿线固定停靠的一个站点。不过，我们的司机先生觉得没有必要再跟这位路盲劫匪罗嗦什么了，于是干脆直接把车开进了布罗姆利警察局。最后，这名劫匪被判刑3年。